6 Online Dating Mistakes You Must Avoid
Recently on MensFitness.com, I was asked to chime in on some of the huge mistakes both men and women were making in their online dating profiles. As an online dating expert and one who has studied the industry since its infancy, the list could have easily jumped to 50 items. Meredith Bodgas selected her top 10 favorites for the story, 10 Little Ways to Kill Your Online Dating Game. We were glad to contribute to the story.
1. DON’T include a laundry list of turnoffs in your profile.
No one wants to date a guy who’s too judgmental. Instead, mention the traits you do want in a girlfriend. You’ll seem way less negative.
2. DON’T Say you want a “drama-free” woman.
It’s a cliché that will not only turn a woman off, but it sends the message that you’ve got excess baggage regarding your ex. Most women will realize you have unresolved issues from past relationships and probably take a pass. Instead, stick to naming the positive qualities you seek in a mate or a date.
3. DON’T Mention sex in your profile.
Include that, and the ladies may think that you’re looking for a hook up. Worried you’ll wind up with a prude? Don’t. Women know that intimacy’s part of the package if the relationship moves forward.
4. DON’T Start IMing right away.
Many women don’t like receiving IMs from men whose profiles they haven’t read yet. So start the dialogue with an e-mail to give her a chance to check out your details. And hold off on IMing until you’ve exchanged a few e-mails. It’s a digital courtship and you need to know the rules to play the game and win.
5. DON’T Tell a woman she’s hot.
Focusing on the physical makes a woman feel you’re not interested in getting to know the real her. Mention something else you admired about her profile if you want your email to be taken seriously.
6. DON’T Wait too long to ask her out.
I believe you should take your relationship from online to offline after a few e-mails, otherwise, you’ll end up with a digital pen-pal, which isn’t quite the point of online dating. If there’s chemistry after one phone chat, set a date to meet in person.
Do you have an online dating story to share? Share your Success Stories to be featured in our Cyber Love Story of the Week and let us know about your bad dates in our Peril of the Week.
Julie Spira is an online dating expert and bestselling author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. She creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more dating advice, sign up for our Weekly Flirt newsletter, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert.