In the News

Online Dating Safety Tips from an Expert

Jul 30th

datingsafety 240x300Online dating safety is something that everyone needs to be concerned with. At Cyber-Dating Expert, we take safety seriously and are always sharing ways for you to feel safe and enjoy the Internet dating experience.

In Louisiana, three stories occurred this month involving people who met online dating, social networking sites that resulting in hijacking and other crimes such as a robbery in a car.

In one case, a man went to his car to meet a potential date, and instead of finding the woman, ten men were there, which resulted in a carjacking.

I spent the morning on the radio on WWL AM/FM in New Orleans to provide dating safety tips to help prevent such occurrences.

While these occurrences are rare, it’s still important to point out the following, whether dating online or offline.

1. Meet in a public place and don’t pick up your date.

2. Don’t give out your last name or information where you work

3. Let a friend know where you are meeting and call in or text to let them know you’re fine

4. Don’t suggest a late night date

5. Never go back to someone’s home on a first date

6. Avoid drinking a lot of alcohol, which will impair your judgment

7. Carry pepper spray on your key chain for when you’re walking to your car at night

8. Conduct a Google search for your date’s name, phone number, and email addresss

9. View your date’s profile photos in a Google reverse image search by uploading it to Google.com/images

10. Do a background or people search for your date on sites such as Radaris or Spokeo

11. Set up a free Google voice account with a number exclusively for dating

12. If you’re uncomfortable for any reason, leave

13. If your date makes you feel unsafe online or offline, report their profile to the dating site

14. Take your time getting to know someone on the phone and through emails before meeting

15. Trust your intuition

Realize that while maybe 10% of your dates might not be truthful or may have ulterior motives, about 90% of the dates are truly great people looking to connect. There are millions of singles finding love online. Keep these safety tips in mind as you schedule your dates, but still enjoy the time getting to know someone.

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OkCupid Relaunches OkTrends Blog – Reveals if Looks Matter

Jul 28th

OkTrends 300x200One of my favorite parts of OkCupid had been the fabulous data curated into blog posts by co-founder Christian Rudder on OkTrends.

For the past three years, OkTrends has gone into silence mode. Today, Rudder revealed data from their Internet dating user base showing that looks aren’t always what counts when it comes to communicating in an online dating site. Rudder announced, “We Experiment On Human Beings” as the title of the long-awaited post.

From OkCupid’s day of hiding photos, to suggestions of a higher percentage for a potential match, one thing we know for sure, the algorithms do have an impact while looking for love online.

Full blogpost here

Let’s take a look at the three different experiments.

1. Love is Blind, Or Should Be

On the 10th anniversary of OkCupid, they launched Crazy Blind Date, a mobile app. The basis of this was that you’d meet someone who’s face had been “mashed up” like a puzzle, so you didn’t know what they looked like. In celebration, OkCupid spent one day mashing up all of their members in an experiment, only to find that 44% of those wrote 1st messages to people, of which they had no idea what they looked like.

2. So What’s a Picture Worth?

OkCupid previously let users rate profiles based on looks and personality. Eventually, they changed it to rating based on looks only. What they found is that only 10% of people rated a profile based on it’s text. Does that mean that 90% of people rate profiles based on looks only? Understandably so. This is why all of the mobile dating apps have been so popular and game-like.

3. The Power of Suggestion

As a Digital Matchmaker, I spend hours-and-hours every day analyzing profiles to find the perfect match for my clients. They have to go by my word and recommendation to write to or respond to a flurry of potential dates because I strongly advised them to do so. This has resulted in singles dating outside their social circles and meeting men or women that they didn’t think was their type.

OkCupid seems to agree. By changing the suggested recommendations from one with a low match percentage to a higher match percentage, their users started to communicate with people that weren’t necessarily a match, based on the algorithms. Were they playing with your digital mind? Just a bit.

Time reports that Rudder will be back to business posting on the OkTrends blog every four weeks while waiting for his book Dataclysm: Who We Are to be released in September.

Are you rating profiles based on looks alone? Do percentages matter to you? Your comments are welcome.

Photo credit: Fotolia

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of the Internet and creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter for dating advice and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

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Conan O’Brien and Dave Franco Play With Tinder

Jul 18th

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Who isn’t talking about Tinder these days?

Last night, I was helping several single ladies in their 20s decide on who to swipe right to and how to find someone who isn’t just looking to hook up.

Meanwhile, at Team Coco, Conan O’Brien and Dave Franco decide to try their luck at Tinder on television.

In a funny skit, they came up with fake screen names, but real photos to learn about the sizzling hot mobile dating trend of Tinder.

Are you swiping right on Tinder? Have you met someone offline and are in a Tinder relationship?

We’d like to hear your Tinder stories.

Follow @JulieSpira for online dating advice and sign up for our free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

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What to Do if He Only Wants to Text Me

Jul 14th

In this video on Your Tango’s Quickie Series, we tackle the subject of the guy who only wants to text you for a date, or in between.

The problem many women have with this is they don’t want to fall into the category of booty call or be uncertain about their relationship status.

While I believe texting can be fun in a relationship, when your guy says, “Thinking of u” or you say “Can’t wait for your delicious kisses,” too many women complain that their boyfriends won’t pick up the phone and call.

Here’s the truth ladies: Most guys don’t really like to talk on the phone. They’ll call to make you happy, if you let them know it means a lot to you. Otherwise, get ready for showing up on a date after being sent a text with the date and time of your next rendezvous. Watch our video to help him go from casual to crazy about you, online and IRL.

But if you tell him the sound of his sexy voice helps you fall asleep with a smile on your face, you just might get this text-happy guy to pick up the phone.

Are you in a text only relationship?

Watch our other Videos.

Your comments are welcome.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She creates irresistible profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more online dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

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Update Your Dating Profile at Girls’ Night Out

Jul 14th

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Ladies in Los Angeles, do you want to make your online dating profile pop? Join me with Match and bebe for a night of fashion and hair styling, dating advice, wine, light bites, profile-worthy photos and music.

The new you starts here at the Beverly Center Location on July 17th from 6p-8p.

Summer’s the perfect time to freshen up your look. Join us at bebe for Girls’ Night Out and a makeover that will grab attention online. You’ll get a flirty new style and personalized tips to use on your next date.

But that’s not all: Professionals from Sexy Hair will be styling hair for FREE! Grab the on-site photographer for a few “after” headshots to use in your dating profile!

Event treats include:

  • Drinks and appetizers
  • bebe’s summer clothing collection to try on
  • Advice from dating coach Julie Spira, founder of Cyber-Dating Expert (Yes, that’s me!)
  • 20% off all regular-priced merchandise purchased at event*

On Facebook or Twitter? Snap a selfie afterwards and share it with hashtag #sexysummer. RSVP today for only $10.

I look forward to seeing you there!

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter for expert online dating advice and to learn more about how to create an irresistible online dating profile.

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