People panicked to fill up their pantries with food and water for the first blizzard of 2015. #Snowmageddon was heading to the east coast with record anticipated snowfall from New York to Boston. Before mass transit ceases to a halt, singles who have filled their date cards are probably wondering whether to cancel their dates or not.
While the snowstorm was milder than expected, if you’re going to be snowbound at all this winter, here are some ways to have fun with your date or still feel attached until it’s safe to go out and play again.
1. Go on a Skype or FaceTime Date
Still have electricity or a full battery on your computer? Get dressed up with what you’d wear on a date, remember to put on your lipstick ladies, and both of you grab a glass of wine or bubbly for the occasion. Log on and have a virtual date rather than canceling.
2. Answer these 36 Love Questions
A Modern Love column on the New York Times reads, To Fall in Love With Anyone, Do This. These questions from Psychologist Dr. Aron suggest they can help you fall in love with anybody. Some questions include: Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life and Tell your partner something that you like about them. This exercise should help you get to know each other better and has been known to be responsible for some marriages.
Not sure if that’s realistic or not? Why not give it a try.
3. Binge Watch on Netflix
Snuggled up with your date? Why not spend the day or evening binge watching some romance on Netflix if you can’t be at work. From House of Cards to Scandal and New Girl to Madmen, you’ll be bonding with your sweetie and won’t be able turn off the TV.
4. Build a Snowman
If you can make it to his or her home, bundle up and go outside to build a snowman or make a snow angel. It’s playful and will bring you back to your youth. In between, indulge with a snowball fight or two.
5. Create an Indoor Scavenger Hunt
If the geography and transportation allow you to keep your scheduled date, a great way to make it fun and flirty is to create a treasure or scavenger hunt in your home. To do this, place romantic clues in envelopes around your house and number them. At each location, there will be a love note with suggestions for a kiss, a back rub, a foot massage, or whatever your imagination will allow.
6. Write a Traditional Love Note.
If your electricity is out and the battery life has expired on your mobile phone, light a candle and grab and pen and paper. It’s time to get traditional and draft a hand-written love note. When you get together for your rescheduled date, hand him or her an envelope to open. You’ll be surprised how it will be received.
Will you be canceling your dates or be taking a digital approach to stay in touch?
Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of the Internet and is the founder of CyberDatingExpert.com. Julie and her team create Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more relationship advice, sign up for the free Weekly Flirt Newsletter and join the conversation on #DateChat on Twitter on Thursdays at 8pm/ET.
Photo credit: Fotolia
Today also happens to be Anita’s birthday.
This song is so beautiful, that it’s frequently played as the first song at weddings.
Listen to the lyrics and click replay if you like.
Do you have a favorite romantic love song to share?
Click here for more Cyber Love Songs.
Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo
Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter.
Sometimes it’s great to be impulsive and go on a last minute date, but in the case of this female dater, she would have been better off if she had gone with a friend or knew her date better before their first concert date.
Wondering what happened? Read the latest entry to the Peril of the Week and find out why this date went south.
This past week, I had an amazing opportunity to see one of the world’s most iconic musicians, Stevie Wonder in concert. But I needed someone to go with. On a whim, I mentioned this to someone I was chatting with on OK Cupid. He jumped at the chance to go.
I did have hesitations on whether or not to go to a concert on a first date but given the superstar playing, I simply assumed there would be enough going on to make even the most awkward date, ok.
I was wrong.
After arriving an hour late, my date suggested I drive to the venue, and could we stop for beers in advance. While I don’t drink, I do understand the importance of the pre-party so I obliged.
Unfortunately, my date decided this would be a great time to down several 20 oz. beers, and this was all before he pulled out the 5th of generic whiskey to wash it down. At this point, he shared with me that he had just started drinking again this year and we hadn’t even gone into the concert yet.
Once inside the venue, my date was determined to get us backstage.
If you know me, you know how much I love this. All you have to do is figure out where the easiest way is to get on the floor and head that way. Right?
No. Not for my date. Perhaps it was the alcohol at this point, but let’s just label this endeavor a mistake.
We did find better seats though, maybe not the floor, but certainly better than our last row tickets. But this was not enough for my date and the mood was set for the concert and the mood was not fun.
Imagine being seated next to someone exceptionally hyper, very buzzed and wanting more than what we have. It was not fun…so not fun that half way through the show, I suggested we leave.
I still can’t believe that a 47-year old man chugged three 20 oz. beers and then pulled out a flask of Old Grandad before walking into a concert for a first date.
Do you have a story for the Peril of the Week?
Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and founder of Cyber-Dating Expert. She was an early adopter of the Internet and online dating. Julie and her team create Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, sign up for the FREE Weekly Flirt newsletter, and like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert
Photo credit: Fotolia
Ready, set, tweet!
We’re super-excited at Cyber-Dating Headquarters to let you know that we’ll be hosting #DateChat on Twitter every Thursday at 8pm Eastern time, 5pm Pacific time.
#DateChat will bring together singles who are looking for love online and IRL to talk about their dating issues and relationship desires. #DateChat will be hosted by online dating expert Julie Spira. Every week we’ll be joined by a guest-host to stimulate the conversation.
Whether you’re newly single or are interested in dating your sweetheart, #DateChat will help spice up your love life.
Here’s how to join the party.
Sign onto Twitter or use your favorite Twitter management software such as Hootsuite or TweetDeck. Make sure you create a stream or do a search for #DateChat and save the search. If you have a question or are replying to a question, remember to use the hashtag of #DateChat in each tweet so others can communicate with you.
To make it easier, you can also log onto TweetChat, where it’s simple to stay in the conversation. Just type in our hashtag of #TweetChat and follow the stream. This will automatically add our hashtag to any tweet. Feel free to retweet any dating advice that you’d like your followers to see or ask questions for the dating community to see.
We look forward to chatting with you on Thursdays to get you date-ready for the weekend.
Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo
Follow @JulieSpira for dating advice and sign up for our free Weekly Flirt newsletter!
What’s all the buzz about ‘Catfishing?’
Ever since the MTV show came out, singles and couples are glued to the television to find out the dirt on who’s being ‘Catfished.’
From women pretending to be men and vice versa, people are falling in love online, but are they really?
In reality, many are just digital pen-pals.
To learn more, listen to the morning show on WDBR in Springfield, where Julie Spira was a recent guest with Dylan, Julie & Co.
From dating safety to how to find a date for Valentine’s Day, you won’t want to miss this audio recording.
Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo
Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of the Internet and online dating. Julie and her team create Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene.
Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the FREE Weekly Flirt newsletter.
It’s exactly one month until Valentine’s Day. If you’re single, there’s no need to hide under the covers. If you’re dating someone, but he hasn’t asked you to be his Valentine just yet, here are some tips to enjoy the day, regardless of your relationship status. Remember, Valentine’s is on a weekend this year and it’s also during President’s Day weekend, so think big and be optimistic.
1. Ramp up Your Online Search
Let’s face it, everyone seems to be online theses days, so if you’re not logging on EVERY day, checking your matches and responding quickly to his emails, some other girl just might get his attention faster. It’s true what they say that the squeaky wheel gets the deal. If you can carve out time to go to the gym, you should be able to schedule time to log on daily. Make sure you’ve signed up for notifications of when someone has emailed you or made you their favorite so you can respond quickly. Ditch the old waiting game rules. This is how the digital dating world words.
2. Keep Swiping Right
If you’re on Tinder, Hinge, or are using the mobile dating apps from your favorite online dating site, make more of an effort to log on and swipe right to your matches. It’s really a numbers game. Unless your match is advertising for a hookup or looks like an ax murderer, swipe right and take a moment to say hello. A guy will be flattered to see the notification that you’re digging him digitally. Remember to take your relationship from online to offline so you can meet IRL.
3. Attend Singles Events
The one thing about singles events is, everyone is in the same boat. They’re single and are hoping to connect with someone. Check out Match.com’s Stir events in your city, RSVP to a MeetUp for a subject you’re passionate about, and attend business networking events. The more you’re out there in the public, the more opportunities you have to flirt with a potential date. Remember not to be too coy. Be bold and smile. Dr. Pat Allen, author of
“Getting to I Do,” suggests the five-second stare. It may feel like an eternity, but it may bring you closer to that cute guy across the room. P.S. Remember to wear red! It’s the color of love and romance and is known to attract men.
4. Text an Ex
Did you know that 20% of singles do text an ex on or around Valentine’s Day? So if both of you are single, why not get together and go down memory lane. Make sure you’re on the same page and just enjoy the evening. You may not be rekindling, but the familiarity might just make it a fun evening rather than flying solo.
5. Don’t Go Overboard
From going to an amusement park to ride the Ferris Wheel to taking a cooking class or going ice skating, make Valentine’s Day a no-pressure experience if you’re in a new relationship and aren’t exclusive yet. There’s no need to break the bank.
Being single on Valentine’s isn’t the end of the world. Sure you go into stores and see nothing but boxes of red candy and roses throughout the grocery stores, but a new survey from U.K. online dating site Smooch.com shows that only 10% of the 2000 singles polled actually love Valentine’s Day. Are the other 90% pretending to go along with the program?
Grab your BFF’s, dress in pink or red, and head to the movies or a concert together. Valentine’s Day isn’t always about love. It’s about spending quality time with someone you really like.
Are you a fan or foe of Valentine’s Day?
Photo credit: Fotolia
Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter
Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of online dating and creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more online dating advice like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert and sign up for the Free Weekly Flirt newsletter.
Come one, come all to the Internet Dating Conference, the largest conference about online dating!
The 40th iDate Conference will be held at the Tropicana Hotel on January 20-22, 2015 and I’ll be on hand on three panels and will be presenting the Best Mobile Dating App at the iDate Awards on the evening of January 21st.
Here’s the rundown of events for Online Dating Expert Julie Spira
- Wednesday, January 21: CNN Panel: Focus on Content Marketing and Industry Trends – 3:30pm Cohiba 6 & 7
- Wednesday, January 21: iDate Awards – 7pm, Tropicana, Cohiba Ballroom 1
- Thursday, January 22: Essence Panel – How Date Experts on How to Use PR and Build Their Brand – 1:30pm
- Thursday, January 22: Final Debate: 4pm
For a $50 discount and to purchase tickets and register for iDate, click here.
View our video below for details on the panels.
I’ll see you in Las Vegas!
Follow @JulieSpira for online dating advice.
I’ve been seeing this guy for 3 months and everything seemed to be going great. He’s very affectionate and talked about his feelings openly with me. On the other hand, I always have a hard time expressing my feelings. On New Year’s Eve, he was telling me how he felt about me and asked me about how I felt as well, but I couldn’t give him a definite answer.
He introduced me to his friends and some family, however since New Year’s he became very distant. He was always the one calling me and has pretty much stopped. I’ve tried to initiate talking to him since then, but he started acting cold.
Now a friend of mine found him on Tinder and I’m devastated. Do you think he’s a player? What do I do? He hasn’t tried to contact me since either. Please help.
Thanks for your sending in your question.
The three month mark is a pivotal point for many relationships. Often it’s the time when a couple who has been dating decides to take the relationship to the next level, to see each other exclusively, and even start referring to each other as “boyfriend” and “girlfriend.”
The fact that he spent New Year’s Eve with you tells me that you are important to him. If he expressed his feelings favorably and didn’t get any positive feedback from you, chances are his ego was hurt and he might assume you aren’t on the same page and don’t feel the same for him. If this is the case, I wouldn’t call him a player. I think he gave the relationship a shot for three months and didn’t believe you felt the same way about him. It could have shattered his self esteem and ego and he might want to find an emotionally available man.
When a man opens up to a woman about his feelings, he’s opening up his heart and puts himself in a vulnerable position. If he even says he thinks he’s falling in love with her and asks her how she feels about it, he’s hoping to hear that she feels the same way.
Depending on how often you were seeing each other, three months is a significant amount of time for a couple to decide if they want to be exclusive and take the relationship to the next level, often typically for another three months to see how things will be at the six month mark.
If he’s acting distant, know that his feelings were probably hurt. Think about it this way. If you told him that you loved him and he couldn’t say it back, how would you feel? Chances are you might start pulling back or even look at other guys who you think are emotionally available and are ready for a relationship. This is probably how he is feeling.
If he stopped calling you completely, he might think it’s over between the two of you, or he might just want some time and space to see how he feels. I wouldn’t chase him as it would push him away more.
A lot of guys are on Tinder, but that doesn’t mean he’s dating anyone else. He may just be viewing profiles to compare the other women to what he had with you, while he’s sorting it out.
Unless you’re prepared to give him the answer that he wants, which is that you feel the same way about him, calling him really won’t be beneficial. Think hard about why you want to be with him. If you think it was a really special relationship and have strong feelings about him, you need to let him know. If you’re feeling rejected that you aren’t hearing from him, but don’t know how you feel about him, then let him go and find someone who wants to have a relationship.
Know that everyone goes at a different pace. In the future if a guy asks you how you feel about him and the relationship, always be honest. If you think you’re feelings could be growing, let him know that you hope to catch up to him and are enjoying getting to know him. This will keep him interested in you.
It appears to me that he got rejected by you and now you’re feeling rejected by his distance. Write down all of the things you liked about this guy and write down the things you didn’t like about him. Review your list and if you think this is someone you really want in your life, give it a little time and then text him and ask him if he’d like to meet you for coffee or write him a letter and let him know that it’s just harder for you to express your feelings than it is for him, but that you’d like to give it another shot.
Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam.
Do you have a dating question for Julie Spira? Send your questions to CyberDatingExpert.com/contact
Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of online dating and creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more online dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.
Ready to jump in to online dating? Find out how our Irresistible Profiles will help you find your dream date.
From New Year’s resolutions including joining a gym, to joining an online dating site to find love in 2015 tops the list for many singles. Are you ready to join the world’s largest digital dating party?
Think about it. Some relationships ran their course and couples broke up before the holidays. Others hung in there until New Year’s and realized they were in a relationship that wouldn’t go the distance. Some singles made the decision after having another holiday alone that they’d make a better effort to find their soul mate.
While Sunday is known to be a busy day for logins on Internet dating sites, the first Sunday of the year is the busiest day for new members to take action with their love lives.
- According to PlentyofFish, 5pm, EST will break all the records with the most number of singles online at one time on the first Sunday of the year.
- POF adds that singles that sign up in January are 15% more likely to meet a significant other and that it will take single men approximately 10 weeks to meet a significant other and it will take single women approximately 8 weeks to couple up.
- The folks at Match.com agree that January 4th is the busiest day of the year for their site. Match reports a 38% increase in membership from December 26th through February 14th.
So whether you’re swiping right on Tinder or your mobile app or logging on to see your daily matches and who has viewed your profile, one thing is for sure. If you’re single and want to connect, you must have a digital dating strategy to help you stand out in the crowded playground.
Here are five tips for online dating in the New Year
- Change your Photos. I’m a big believer that a picture tells 1000 words. If you have the budget to hire a photographer, have him or her take photos of you in your natural environment. It’s an expense that might help you find your dream date.
- Create a New Catchy Screen Name. If you’re on a site which allows you to have a screen name or user name other than your first name, come up with something unique that describes your personality. Using your name and zip code isn’t very original or catchy. Some great names include anything athletic such as LovestoSki or YogaLover to anything artistic such as MusicLover or Drummer4U.
- Ask questions! Writing an online dating profile can be as bland as writing your resume while you’re job hunting. The difference is, you need to create an opportunity to open a dialog with your potential date. Describe things that you’d like to do together with someone as a couple and ask a question such as, I enjoy hiking in the Santa Monica Canyon. Have you ever been?
- Be proactive. They say the squeaky wheel gets the deal in business, but what about online? Too many women are afraid to contact a man because they think they will appear needy or desperate. I say, toss out those old rules. Men are flattered when they receive an email from a woman, so don’t wait, initiate.
- Be engaged. Whether you’re looking for a ring on your finger or just a date for Friday night, the more active that you are online, the more likely your profile will be raised to the top. Many sites give you tools to search for dates, opportunities to “like” photos, and send you emails with potential matches. The more you use these tools, the greater chance you have to fill up your date card.
If you need some help, our signature Irresistible Profiles and personalized dating coaching programs just might be exactly what you’re looking for in the New Year. We’ve helped singles around the world find love and look forward to helping you while looking for love online.
Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo.
Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of Internet dating, having created her first profiles over 20 years ago. For more online dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.
Mobile apps for transportation have caused a huge paradigm shift in the way people are using transportation to airports or just on a party night. With New Year’s Eve, using your mobile app for companies such as Uber, Lyft or Sidecar will help you safely get to your destination.
But what if these mobile apps can actually help you find love from the comfort of one of their cars?
Meet Camille Bates and Ian Osborne, both who are Lyft drivers in San Francisco.
Last New Year’s Eve, Camille was very sad after a holiday season filled with strife. She had ended her relationship with her boyfriend after a year of being together and was feeling down in the dumps. The last thing she wanted to do was to go to a New Year’s party and pretend to be happy. So instead of accepting a party invitation, the social-introvert decided her plan for the evening would be to drive all night to get party goers safely to their destinations.
“I wanted to live vicariously through other peoples’ happiness,” said Bates. “I brought along party favors including glow in the dark wristbands and snacks and was having fun giving out things to my passengers.”
At around 9pm, Camille accepted a ride request from a gentleman named Ian. Coincidentally, Ian was also a Lyft driver on occasion.
Camille had made a New Year’s resolution to follow her intuition and she figured he’d already been background checked by Lyft, so she agreed to join them. As Ian entered the car with his buddies, he instructed her to take them to a house party in the Marina. Ian was sitting in the front of the car next to Camille and his friends were in the back seat. Her passengers were singing songs loudly, and after Camille asked them about the party they would be attending, Ian casually asked Camille if she wanted to join them.
While at the party, Ian’s friends decided to leave to attend another bash, leaving Ian and Camille to themselves at the original party. A few hours and glasses of champagne later, the two headed up to the party host’s roof deck to toast in the New Year. As the clock struck midnight, they shared their first kiss. As they looked over the beach on the Embarcadero in San Francisco, Camille reflected to a month earlier where she was gazing at the same beach when a shooting star appeared. Her wish was to find her soul mate.
Nine magical months later, Ian asked Camille to marry him and they will be getting married in the summer of 2016.
You never know who you’ll meet while using your mobile apps, or how a “pickup” will turn out.
Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace in 2015, or wherever you may roam.
Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of online dating and is the founder of CyberDatingExpert.com. Julie helps singles find love in the digital age. For dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the free Cyber-Dating Expert Weekly Flirt newsletter.