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Cyber Love Song of the Week – What is Love – Howard Jones

musicalheart2 150x150Happy #MusicMonday.

Today we’re featuring the Howard Jones song, “What is Love?” as our Cyber Love Song of the Week.

Love is something most of us dream of, hope for and hurt deeply when we lose it.

The lyrics of this song will question what love is, but I believe love comes in all shapes and forms. We love our friends, our families, our pets, and hopefully ourselves. There’s a saying that you’ll know you’re in love when you feel it. Sometimes love comes gradually, sometimes it changes into a deep friendship.

Enjoy this song and embrace all forms of love that find their way to you.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam.

Listen to more featured Cyber Love Songs

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter

The Olympics, Sports, and Your Love Life

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When you’re single and are on an online dating site, you spend hours-and-hours often answering questions to find a compatible match.

When it comes to physical activities, most men I know who are huge skiers, won’t date a woman who won’t play in the snow with them.

In conjunction with the Sochi Olympics, PlentyOfFish looked at 50,000 of their single members to find out which sports fans will get lucky in love and which activities were the best turn-on’s.

The survey showed that nearly 1 in 2 single men are watching the Olympics because the athletes are sexy, and roughly 1 in 3 single women admit to watching a sport purely for the sex appeal.

POF found that snowboarding and ice hockey were considered the sexiest Winter Olympic Sports by the single women, while the majority of men preferred figure skating.

It was no surprise that the top ranked most handsome male athlete was Olympic snowboarder Bode Miller.

The Top 5 Sexiest athletes at Sochi from the singles survey include:

  1.  Bode Miller (Skiing) 22.4%
  2.   Henrik Lundqvist (Hockey) 15.6%
  3. Charlie White (Figure Skating) 6.1%
  4. Bobby Brown (Skiing) 3.4%
  5. Shani Davis (Speed Skating) 1.4%

Top 5 Sexiest Female Athletes Competing at Sochi:

  1. Lolo Jones (Bobsleigh) 14.9%
  2. Linn Haug (Snowboarding) 14.2%
  3. Anna Fenninger (Skiing) 11.2%
  4. Anna Sidorova (Curling) 10.8%
  5. Tina Maze (Alpine Skiing) 8.6%

Other findings include:

  • Snowboarding and Ice Hockey are considered the sexiest Winter Olympic sport by single women, each earning 27.3% of the votes
  • An overwhelming 43.6% of single men consider Figure Skating to be the sexiest Winter Olympic sport
  • Men and women agree that curling is the least attractive Winter Olympic sport – (41.7% of women and 28.3% of men)
  • 49.1% of singles consider Beach Volleyball the sexiest Summer Olympic sport
  • 51.9% of singles consider Weight Lifting to be the least attractive Summer Olympic sport

So how does this relate to your dating life?

PlentyOfFish found the following statistics:

  • Singles who share a love of Hockey are 440% more likely to form a relationship
  • Singles who share a love of Skiing are 380% more likely to form a relationship
  • Singles who share a love of Swimming are 280% times more likely to form a relationship
  • Singles who share a love of Biking are 280% times more likely to form a relationship.

So what’s the answer? Start spending more time outdoors if you want to find a relationship. Go to sports bars and watch hockey games, take a ski lesson, and wipe the dust off the bicycle that’s sitting in your garage.

Do you enjoy outdoor activities with a date?

Your comments are welcome.

Original post from POF

Julie Spira is an online dating expert and founder of CyberDatingExpert.com. She creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more online dating advice follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

Julie Spira on FOX Studio 11 – Online Dating Advice [video]

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Finding love on an dating website can be exciting. On FOX 11, I shared online dating tips with Christine DeVine and talked about how to do a background search.

Singles should be concerned about possible romance scams. Even the FTC, FBI and BBB are warning singles to be safe around Valentine’s.

Meeting singles online should be a fun and safe experience. Daters need to protect their hearts and their wallets and 71% of those polled by Harris Interactive on behalf of Spokeo said they would conduct a search on someone they’re dating or are considering dating.

Los Angeles Local News | FOX 11 LA KTTV

1. Meet someone in a public place and let a friend know who you’re planning on meeting. Text your friend to let them know you’re safe.

2. Ask a lot of questions to get to know someone. Where did they go to school? How long have you lived in in this city?

3. Do a search to feel safer that the person behind the keyboard is who they claim to be by going to Spokeo.com. (marital status, age, reverse email/phone number search)

4. Check to see if social media profile photos match their dating profile photos.

5. Be careful of communicating with people from another country. Often they are originally from the U.S. and are working abroad. They will feel like they’ve fallen in love with you instantly and ask for money after a few email exchanges.

6. Don’t accept a late night date for drinks.

7. Use recent photos and tell your accurate age.  Be honest and authentic.

Remember, there are 40 million singles dating online. You might just be that one in 40 million and find your digital sweetheart.

Julie Spira is an online dating expert and founder of CyberDatingExpert.com. She creates irresistible profiles for singles on the dating scene. Julie is a paid Spokesperson for Spokeo and believes in practicing safe online dating. For dating advice follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

The Cyber Dating Expert Valentine’s Survival Guide

valentineslogoIt’s back! Our annual Valentine’s Survival Guide with tips to help singles and couples to get through Valentine’s weekend.

On an added note, there will be a full moon on Valentine’s this year, so if you’re thinking about leaning in for that first kiss, don’t be shy. A full moon can bring out the romance just about any time of the year.

We’ve been busy at Cyber-Dating Expert Headquarters helping singles find love online with our Irresistible Profiles and being interviewed in the media for the latest digital dating trends for 2014.

With out further digital ado, here are some of our articles to bring the love back in your life.

Fotolia 48108645 XSTen Fun Valentine’s Date Ideas

From riding the Ferris Wheel to a scavenger hunt, find out why in-room-dining at home can be one of the most romantic ways to celebrate Valentine’s Day, regardless of your relationship status.

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Would You Text an Ex on Valentine’s Day? 20% Said Yes!

Being single on Valentine’s isn’t the end of the world. Sure you go into stores and see nothing but boxes of red candy and roses throughout the grocery stores, but a new survey from U.K. online dating site Smooch.com shows that only 10% of the 2000 singles polled actually love Valentine’s Day. Are the other 90% pretending to go along with the program?

71% of Singles Would Research a Date to Feel Safe: See Spokeo’s Infographic

SpokeoValentinesInfographic

Researching dates can prevent a romance scam this Valentine’s Day. Nothing is more important than being safe and knowing who your date really is to protect your heart and your wallet. Read my seven tips on how to be safe this Valentine’s Day and find out who’s doing the searching.

Social Media Rules for a Happy Valentine’s Day

From Twitter to Facebook, Pinterest to Instagram, find out what to post, or not to post on your favorite social networks.

DON’T: Tag your new boyfriend on Facebook. Chances are he hasn’t told his buddies and work pals about his Valentine’s plans.

DO: Post a photo if you’ve received flowers, a fun gift, or of the dessert at dinner. Everyone loves to view the photos and will cheer you on with “likes.”

DON’T: Post your Happy Valentine’s message on your date’s wall. Saying you can’t wait until the evening together should remain private. Remember, a simple post may be innocent. However your friends might wonder what kind of wild night the two of you will be having. Or worse yet, his ex-girlfriend might start posting inappropriate comments to ruin your evening.

DO: Send a digital gift, such as his or her favorite band on iTunes, an e-card, or a redeemable gift card to a store or restaurant.

DON’T: Send a musical montage of “I Love You” songs if you haven’t said those three little words yet.

DO: Ask for permission before you post anything online. Remember you’re creating a permanent digital footprint and your status and photos can be shared, even by people you don’t know.

DON’T: Overshare. Remember, many of your friends are single and may not be enjoying the day.

DO: Make an exciting announcement. If you become engaged on Valentine’s Day, your friends will want to know.

DON’T: Change your Facebook relationship status to “In a Relationship” until both of you have had the talk and agree to be on the same digital page.

Do you have any social media rules for Valentine’s Day?

Huffington Post – Using Social Media for Valentine’s Day Dates and Gifts

The Wonder of Tech – The Online Dating Expert Shares Her Secrets for Success

DatingAdvice.com – 6 Ways to Find Love Online by Valentine’s Day

The Marilu Henner Show – Listen to our Interview on finding love by Valentine’s Day

LA Story – Spokeo Infographic Gives Hot 411 on Valentine’s Day. Dating Expert Julie Spira Connects the Dots

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam this Valentine’s.

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter

 

Would You Text an Ex?

smoochthumbnail 238x300Being single on Valentine’s isn’t the end of the world. Sure you go into stores and see nothing but boxes of red candy and roses throughout the grocery stores, but a new survey from U.K. online dating site  Smooch.com shows that only 10% of the 2000 singles polled actually love Valentine’s Day. Are the other 90% pretending to go along with the program?

Do you find this a bit shocking? According to Smooch, Valentine’s is a time for singles to feel even more single.

Smooch.com Marketing Manager, Lucy Clarke, said of the findings;

“Valentine’s Day is a time to celebrate dating, whether you’re single or in a relationship. But with Valentine’s Day campaigns aimed at couples everywhere you turn at this time of year, it’s hardly surprising that the day makes singletons feel even more single.

Their findings even included that 16% of singles actually lied about receiving a Valentine and 63% wish they did have a date on Valentine’s Day.

So let’s get to the subject of texting. It’s rare on any holiday to NOT hear from an ex. Whether it’s Thanksgiving, New Year’s, Christmas, or Valentine’s, some singles can’t help but reach for the phone to connect with an ex. It’s a non-threatening way of sending a little digital love.

How should you say “Happy Valentine’s Day” to an ex via text? Are you concerned that sending a text doesn’t mean you’re  looking to rekindle a spark or end up in bed? Not necessarily. Often singles have fond memories of spending Valentine’s with someone from their past. Perhaps that romantic trip you took 5 years ago is still on his or her minds.

Although Smooch discourages singles from texting an ex, I disagree. Valentine’s can be a warm and fuzzy day or a day that can be filled with disappointments from the unrealistic expectations. I’m all for texting an ex, as long as it’s not to rekindle the spark within a few hours. Keep it friendly. Say, “Happy Valentine’s Day….Thinking of you and hope you’re doing great.”

The best times to send a text to an ex is in the morning. Keep it simple and friendly. Don’t ask your ex if he or she has a Valentine or is in a relationship. You broke up for a reason. If you do receive a text from an ex, don’t read more into it than just a simple friendly exchange. If you’re in a relationship, hold back from texting an ex. If your current sweetheart happens to see your text exchange on your phone on the most romantic day of the year, you might end up getting the cold shoulder or be sleeping alone that night.

Would you text an ex on Valentine’s Day? Your comments are welcome.

Smooch.com Valentines Infographic1

Julie Spira is an online dating expert and celebrity dating coach. She’s the founder of CyberDatingExpert.com and author of the bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating.  Julie creates irresistible profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the Free Weekly Flirt.

 

How to Create the Best Online Dating Profile

onlinedatingprofile 250x300As Valentine’s Day is practically around the corner, one of the most popular questions I receive as an online dating expert is how to have the best online dating profile to find a date in time for Valentine’s. Match now reports that online dating is the #1 way for singles to find a date, with 31% of singles finding love online.

Since Internet dating is available 24-hours a day, it’s time to grab your mobile phone and give your Internet dating profile a simple digital facelift.

Here are 8 tips to help your profile stand out.

1. Create a catchy screen name. Some sites just provide you with a number or variation of a screen name if your chosen name isn’t selected. Using your first name and a handful of digits isn’t catchy. Try to find a name that is unique to you and describes your personality. An example would be MusicLoverNYC if you live in New York and love music. Others would be YogaGirlLA or NurseLori.

2. Leave the novel at home. The best profiles are short and will pique the interest of a potential date. I always recommend 100-125 words in your essay. If it’s shorter, it shows that you’re not taking online dating seriously. If it’s too long, there will be nothing left to talk about on the date. Plus, men don’t like to read long-winded profiles. It seems overwhelming and leaves the perception that you could be a high drama person.

3. Post 3-5 photos. Both men and women are visual. Every profile must have 3-5 photos in it, with the primary photo being a close-up shot with a smile. I always recommend that a woman wear red in her profile, as men see too many little black dresses, so you won’t blend into the thousands of thumbnail shots. Red is also the color of love and passion. Statistics show that women wearing red do receive more views and emails. Remember to include a full-length body shot, so it doesn’t appear that you’re hiding anything and don’t wear sunglasses in your photos.

4. Ditch the selfies. Although the word ‘Selfie’ made it into the Oxford dictionary, a selfie isn’t the most flattering photo, so keep it off of your profile. Remember, this is your love life resume and if you’re hoping to attract the man of your dreams, make sure you look like his dream girl.

5. Ask a question. The goal of online dating is to make your profile come alive and be approachable. If you ask a question in your profile, it makes it easier for your potential date to engage in a conversation with you. After all, you’re trying to develop a rapport with someone, not just be a stagnant billboard.

6. It’s not All About You. A man would like to imagine what a life with you could be like, so make it easier for him to know. Talk about what date night with you would be like and say, on a weekend, it would be great to go hiking with you on a Saturday morning and maybe take in a film matinee in the afternoon. When you talk about your life’s passions, end the sentence with, “what about you?” If you name some of your favorite travel spots, include a question to ask him where his dream trip would be.

7. Be specific. Profiles that are more specific help start the conversation. From a man’s point of view, profiles all look about the same. So say you like to travel, and list some of your favorite travel spots. Talk about how you like music and how the Red Hot Chili Peppers are one of your favorite bands and that you enjoyed watching them in the Super Bowl half time show.

8. Dump the cliches. Men know that women love going on beach walks, but if your profile says I like beach walks, sunset dinners, and love to laugh, your online dating profile is filled with cliches. Leave those conversations for your first few dates and laugh when you’re together, not on your profile.

At the end of the digital day, online dating is a numbers game. You need to play to win.

Here’s more information on how you can get an Irresistible Online Dating Profile.

For more online dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

Photo credit: © JiSIGN – Fotolia.com

Researching Dates Can Prevent a Romance Scam

SpokeoValentinesInfographic

Romance scams have been in the news lately from singles who are members of online dating sites and social networking sites. Every time I hear one of these stories, it breaks my heart. With Valentine’s Day putting extra pressure on dating, it’s extremely important to make sure that singles are doing their research when looking for a date, whether online or offline.

Know that online dating safety is of the highest importance here at Cyber-Dating Expert.

As a result, I’ve become a Spokesperson for Spokeo, an online search service which provides publicly available data to help you research your dates.

New research provided by Spokeo and Harris Interactive was just released which shows that 71% of Americans are willing to conduct some kind of informational search about the person they are dating. This tells me that singles are taking dating safety very seriously.

Here are 7 tips to help avoid being a victim of a romance scam.

1. If your date’s photos are either blurry or look like they are from a stock photo gallery, or look model-like or too good to be true, it’s time to do some digging.

2. Those involved in perpetrating a romance scam want to take the conversation off the dating site quickly and onto a private chat or instant messenger service. This avoids having the conversations documented or traceable by the dating site’s software. Until you’re sure about your date, keep the conversations on the dating site.

3. If he or she says they’re in love with you very quickly, don’t jump for joy just yet. Romance scammers often will say they’ve never felt this way before about anyone before and they’ve waited their whole life to meet you. Their grammar often isn’t correct and they have an accent if you speak to them on the phone.

4. If he or she lives out of town or out of the country, find out where they really live. If their efforts to visit you get repeatedly canceled due to a work or family emergency, you should be raising a digital eyebrow.

5. If your potential date has a work or family emergency and asks you to wire them money, don’t fall for it. It’s likely they’ll say if you really love them, you’ll help them out and they’ll pay you back quickly. Often the excuse is their funds are temporarily tied up. Don’t fall for it.

6. Make sure to look up the data that you have on someone you’re dating. This can be easily done by plugging the information you have into an online search engine to see if what you find online matches up with what the other person is claiming. Sites like Google and Spokeo can be very informative to research your date.

7.  If any of these things happen to you, never ever send money. Do not sent money via Western Union or a foreign bank. Report the profile in question to the dating site and understand that you’re one of many that this person is writing to try try to sweep you off your feet and promise you a life of love and happiness.

Know that you can do a simple search of your potential date’s email address, phone number, or even user name by going to Spokeo.com.

Happy safe dating this Valentine’s Day.

Enjoy the Infographic below and feel free to share this with all of your single friends.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam.Julie Spira is an online dating expert and was an early adopter of Internet dating. She creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more online dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

Disclaimer: Cyber-Dating Expert is a paid Spokesperson for Spokeo

business of love dating and safety

35% of Americans Willing to Pay for Dating Research in Order to Feel Safer – An infographic by the team at Spokeo People Search

Finding Love on Facebook’s 10th Birthday

Facebook10birthday 270x300Facebook is celebrating a big birthday. It’s been a decade since Mark Zuckerberg founded “thefacebook” while in college on February 4, 2004.

Ten years later, Facebook boasts over 1.2 billion users. One has to ask, is Facebook now the world’s largest digital dating site?

Just how many couples are flirting, connecting, hooking up, and even finding love on Facebook?

When I launched Facebook Love Stories on Valentine’s Day last year, I was intrigued to see the variety of ways that people found love on the world’s largest social network.

Here are six couples whose love stories will warm your digital heart.

Bonnie and Josh

bonjoshie2 300x225Bonnie and Josh had met 30 years earlier at an advertising agency in New York.

“Working in different departments meant that our professional paths didn’t cross much, but we often rode the Fifth Avenue bus home together, as our apartments were in the same neighborhood,” said Bonnie. The two married others and lost touch, until Bonnie’s son created a Facebook page for her a few years ago.

Bonnie decided to look for old friends and thought about Josh. “I sent him a message asking if he remembered me and he responded within hours, so excited to hear from me,” said Bonnie.  Within three days they were talking on the phone for hours at a time, and within weeks made a date for dinner. Josh  showed up with carrot cake and a dozen bagels and Bonnie was hooked.  The two were engaged the following New Year’s Eve, and were married August of 2012.

The couple’s wedding cake was a delicious Fifth Avenue bus. “In my wildest dreams I’d never have imagined that Facebook would change my life, but it did.  It reconnected me with Josh, and I consider it a miracle,” said Bonnie.

Sophie and Trevor

IMG 1327 199x300Sophie and Trevor were both members of a “Star Wars” Facebook group when they became friends in 2007. Sophie lived in Leeds, England and Trevor resided in Indiana where he was attending University. Neither were interested in developing a long-distance relationship. The two became fast friends as they shared their mutual love of fan fiction.

After three months, Sophie and Trevor decided to meet in person and selected Berlin as the city for their first date. Later that year, they realized they were falling in love.

Over the next several years, the two commuted between Indiana and England, as their relationship flourished.

Both Sophie and Trevor acknowledge that Facebook played a huge part in keeping them connected, during the time of their long-distance relationship.

In 2012, the two finally got married in New York City and are finally living on the same continent, in each others’ arms in the Big Apple.

Meca and Anthony

600417 4997330937626 2026657527 n 300x300For about four years, Meca and Anthony were digital friends on Facebook, but they never really had much contact with each other. The two shared a lot of mutual Facebook friends and even attended offline events at the same time twice, but they never actually met in person.

As a divorced woman, Meca started blogging about her dating experiences and posted her stories on Facebook. Anthony silently enjoyed reading about Meca’s latest dates and started sending her private messages on Facebook.

“I wanted to know why a girl like her was single,” said Anthony. Their romance developed on Facebook chat privately and finally one day they decided to exchange phone numbers.

Meca was very hesitant at first, especially as Anthony was an artist. As an accessory designer, Meca didn’t think she wanted to date an abstract painter. “I don’t date artists,” she proclaimed. Soon they discovered that they were indeed soul mates.

The two have decided to save the mushy stuff for the privacy of their inbox.

Patience and Sam

1162844532 f8xst L 300x207Patience had a secret crush on Sam in high school, but felt that he was out of her league. They never dated and barely acknowledged each other in the halls. During a formal high school dance, after her date had ditched her, Patience was shocked when Sam asked her to dance and pulled her into a random picture.

Fast forward twenty-six years later, where Sam was divorced and teaching college in Israel. Patience was busy with her publishing career in New York and had serial dated for two decades. When Sam noticed her familiar face in the “Suggested Friends” feature, he immediately sent Patience a “friends’ request.

For Patience, it was a no-brainer to be in contact with such a popular guy from high school. She started “liking” his status updates. Sam picked up the phone and called her.  After several months of Skype and Facebook chats, the two fell in love.

Sam asked Patience if he could visit and possibly “marry and father her children.” All of her girlfriends thought she was crazy, but she knew there was a connection there. In fact, they had a deal. He would come visit and would leave if they thought it was weird. Fortunately, that was not the case. The two are now happily married and are living in New York. Sam still has the photo from their first dance in high school.

Alexa and Devin

Alexa was hoping to find someone on an online dating site, but was frustrated with the process. Her friends said she’d find someone when she least expected it. That someone was Devin who she met on Facebook.

Devin thought Alexa was cute when he noticed her photo in the “People You Should Know” feature.

“One day I received a ‘friend’ request from someone I didn’t know named Devin,” said Alexa. “We had one mutual friend in common, so I thought I might have met him somewhere and just didn’t remember. He was the first person in my six years of being on Facebook that I added without knowing in real life,” she added.

The rest is history and the two have been inseparable since meeting on Facebook.

Taunia and Jake

FBlovestorytauniaandjake 300x225Tauna and Jake went down digital memory lane and rekindled their college romance on Facebook.

It all started twenty years ago when Taunia met Jake while in school. The two dated for 2.5 years and then went their separate ways to pursue their career aspirations. “We always knew we were each other’s ‘true love,’’ said Taunia.

Twenty years and a lot of life lessons went by. Taunia had gastric bypass surgery in 2008. She got married, established her musical career, and developed an online following, particularly on Facebook.

Tania reconnected with one of Jake’s sisters on Facebook. When Jake’s sister noticed Tania’s relationship status as “Divorced,” she told her brother. Jake immediately contacted Taunia to reconnect and their romance reignited. Jake proposed to Taunia in a romantic holiday trip in front of the Eifel Tower and the two were married in the summer of 2013.

Have you found love on Facebook?

Julie Spira is an online dating expert, dating coach, and founder of CyberDatingExpert.com. She creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene and is Editor-in-Chief of FacebookLoveStories.com.

Cyber Love Song – Bruno Mars, Just the Way You Are

musicalheart2 150x150Happy Music Monday.

The biggest highlight of the Super Bowl was the half-time show with Bruno Mars performing.

His song Just the Way You Are is one of the most romantic songs and we’re happy to feature it as our Cyber Love Song of the Week. Enjoy these sweet lyrics and maybe even play it for your sweetheart on Valentine’s Day.

Enjoy!

Do you have a favorite romantic love song?

Listen to our other featured Cyber Love Songs

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter.

Are the Super Bowl and Valentine’s Created Equally?

superbowlAs we’re counting down to Super Bowl Sunday in New Jersey, whether you’re rooting for the Seattle Seahawks or the Denver Broncos, one thing is for sure, it’s going to be an emotional and exciting two weeks for both men and women alike.

Some questions I always hear from women are, “Do men hate Valentine’s?” Guys want to know, “Do women really love the Super Bowl halftime show, or do they act enthusiastically to keep their guys happy or to met men?

I’ve gone on record as saying the Valentine’s Day for Women is like the Super Bowl for Men.  It’s a double-header this month, so enjoy the ride and guys, don’t wait until the last minute to invite the object of your affection or digital crush out for Valentine’s Day.

This weekend is sacred for most American men. It’s showtime as most guys count down the days, hours, and even minutes to their favorite television day of the year, Super Bowl Sunday.

Meanwhile, across the hall, women have their own favorite holiday to think about, Valentine’s Day. With these two major events less that two weeks apart, it’s become obvious that the Super Bowl for men is revered in the same way as Valentine’s Day is for women. Whether you’re a sports fan or a hopeless romantic, comparing the two will help you understand how important these days are for the opposite sex.

Why do I think the Super Bowl for men is like Valentine’s Day for women? Quite simply, both men and women put all of their emotional energies into these two bigger-than-life events. Often, a woman doesn’t understand why watching two teams trying to score is so important to her guy. He just can’t miss this game. Guys on the other hand, simply don’t understand that if you’re dating a woman and forget to plan something, just anything for Valentine’s Day, you probably won’t get a date with her on February 15th, or shortly thereafter.

Men wait all year for the Super Bowl, this big day in television. Women wait for Valentine’s Day with the hope that their special guy will either propose, offer to take his online dating profile down, or say “I love you” for the first time. Women even secretly hope that the guy they are dating might want to change his Facebook status from “Single” to “In a Relationship.”

Men are very prepared for the Super Bowl. They decide which venue and with whom they would like to spend watching the big game. In January, many women start giving little hints about their favorite romantic restaurants, hoping their guy will take the cue and book a reservation before the venue becomes full.

However in contrast, when a man’s favorite team loses the Super Bowl, he will be disappointed but will get over it. He’ll know there’s another chance next year and will spend the entire football season rooting for his team. If a woman’s favorite beau or someone she is dating doesn’t ask her out for Valentine’s Day, she won’t get over it. She’ll assume he’s romancing another woman and will know she’s not on the top of his list. Chances are, his shelf life as her number one guy will immediately expire. Unless he’s out of town on business or in a long-distance relationship, he won’t get another chance to romance her. No woman wants to be at the bottom of the totem pole, especially on Valentine’s Day. Expect to be unfriended, or don’t be surprised if she doesn’t return your phone calls or texts.

So whether you like football or not, love or hate Valentine’s Day, remember to talk to the person you are dating about what these days mean to you. If you’re single, use this opportunity to accept all invitations for both the Super Bowl and Valentine’s singles mixers. Even if your team loses and you’re dateless on the 14th, you’ll be casting a wider net and expanding your social circle.

So go ahead and accept that Super Bowl party invitation. If you’re single, you just might find a date in time for Valentine’s as well. It’s a win-win for everyone. If you need help with your profile or online dating advice, our special 15 Magic Minutes is going on through Valentine’s Day.

And speaking of Valentine’s Day, here are some gift ideas to embrace and those Valentine’s gifts to ignore.

Related: Social Media Rules for Valentine’s Day

Which team will you be rooting for this Super Bowl?

Julie Spira is an online dating expert and author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. For more dating advice follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, sign up for our Weekly Flirt and like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert.

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