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Finding Love on Your Cell Phone

Is it possible to find love from your mobile phone?

Within 24 hours after we completed the first season of Mobile Dating Bootcamp, I was contacted by the Washington Post as an expert in mobile dating for a featured story they were writing on the subject. With the rapid growth and popularity of mobile dating apps, their in-depth piece on the subject entitled, “Love on the run: the fast rise of mobile dating apps” appeared on the cover of the business section of the Sunday paper on August 19, 2012.

Franklin, one of our contestants, was more than happy to share his experience with the Washington Post. After all, he’s truly looking for his wife and is hoping that by using mobile dating apps, it will speed up his search.

Full story @Washington Post by Amrita Jayakumar

Story excerpt

At a swanky Los Angeles hotel in June, six single people sat before a roomful of industry executives to discuss that issue.

This annual conference is a gathering of the biggest players in the dating app business. The six participants had signed up for a first-of-its-kind mobile dating boot camp, organized by Julie Spira, an author and cyber-dating expert.

Their mandate was simple: Try out two apps for two weeks and provide honest feedback.

While developers collect their own statistics and user responses, this was the first time this sort of focus group was organized, she said.

Franklin Horn had never tried mobile dating before.

“I don’t think I would have started it on my own, and I’m in the software industry,” said Horn, 27, who works at a tech startup in Santa Monica. “It’s a hard thing to put yourself out there.”

He used three apps: eHarmony, Skout and MeetMoi. While he didn’t go on any dates, Horn said he exchanged about 150 casual messages with a few women.

“Since I’m single and busy, I wanted to use it as a way to practice flirting and see the technology behind the apps,” he said.

Another participant, Joe, 30, from Chicago, described his experience in a blog.“With these apps it feels like, ‘Hey, I’m in the area, I’m looking to hang out,’ he wrote. “You know what somebody’s intention is. It’s a little more explicit up front.”

Spira says that just like online dating, people should apply common sense with an app.

“You have to use intuition and act the way you would in real life,” she said. “Like meeting in a public place.”

All the dating app users were clear that they’d prefer meeting someone the old-fashioned way, without technology. Even if they did use an app, they wanted to take the relationship from online to offline as soon as possible, said Spira, the cyber dating expert.

“I’m sure Mrs. Horn is out there somewhere,” Horn, the boot camp participant, said. “The app is just a way to meet her.”

The next season of Mobile Dating Bootcamp will take place in January, 2013 in Las Vegas at the Internet Dating Conference. We’ll be casting contestants in October, 2012.

Julie Spira is an online dating and mobile dating expert and host of Mobile Dating BootCamp. She’s the CEO and founder of Cyber-Dating Expert and was an early adopter of online dating from dial-up to mobile. Julie creates irresistible profiles for singles on the dating scene to shorten their search while looking for love online.  For more dating advice, sign up for the Weekly Flirt and follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert

Dating in a Mobile World [video]

What do you get when you match up 8 single daters and 8 mobile dating apps?

Hi, this is Julie Spira and I’ve created Mobile Dating Bootcamp, a social dating experience to help singles find love from the convenience of their mobile phones.

With over 14 million singles using mobile dating apps, we decided to put mobile to the test. Let’s see what the daters had to say.

For more videos, visit MobileDatingBootCamp.com and like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert


Cyber Love Links

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It’s time to take a moment and share some of our favorite articles about dating, love and romance in a Web 2.0 World that we shared on Twitter and thank those for including Cyber-Dating Expert’s advice in their stories.

A huge thank you to our friends at Mashable who posted two stories, How Social Media Helps Romantic Relationships Thrive and 10 Dating Apps To Help You Find True Love. Both were tweeted over 1300 times each. Thank you from the bottom of my digital heart for including our Mobile Dating BootCamp in the story.

On Twitter, Kathleen Miles from Huffington Post alerted me to the new risque billboard on Sunset Boulevard for dating site Cougar Life, so I shared it on the LA Dating Advice column on Examiner in, Is Sunset Boulevard the New Home for Cougars? I’ll let you decide.

Thank you to Online Personals Watch for sharing and contributing to Dating in a Mobile World. Mobile Dating BootCamp contestant videos should be posted shortly and we’ll start casting for Season 2, to be held in Las Vegas. Best Background Checks posted Experts Reveal 7 Tips for Safer Online Dating,

If you missed the Magnetizing Love Telesummit, you can catch our 25 Twitter Secrets to Finding Love Online and catch up in a few minutes. Our friends at GalTime posted a great article, Getting Rid of Past Loves, which we had to share on Twitter. Sometimes it takes awhile to knock your ex of his or her pedestal. This article should help. We tweeted The Phoenix New Times article, The Seven Strangest Online Dating Sites and was surprised to see sites for dating with food allergies and dating a redhead.

You can share your dating stories in our Peril of the Week and remember our friends at Bad Online Dates and ABC’s 20/20 are looking for your videos on dating disasters, so keep your iPhone handy and start shooting away.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam.

Julie Spira and the Cyber-Dating Expert Team.

Sign up for the Weekly Flirt

Watch Mobile Dating Expert Julie Spira on NBC News

As we get ready for the Mobile Dating Conference, I spoke with NBC News in Miami about how to find love from your mobile phone. It’s becoming the most popular way for singles to find finding love in a Web 2.0 World.

“They’re not just using them for phone calls,” author and online dating expert Julie Spira said. “They’re making dates, reservations, buying shoes, buying books … and dating fits into that as well.”

Many traditional online dating sites are now launching their own apps. Spira said some offer instant gratification.

“We call it location-based service dating, so if you’re at a Starbucks and there’s somebody down the street at a sandwich shop and you’re on the same mobile app, maybe you can meet for dessert,” Spira said.

Many thanks to everyone at NBC 6 in Miami for featuring CyberDatingExpert.com in your story.

For more about mobile dating, visit our Mobile Dating BootCamp site, where 8 contestants are using 8 mobile apps and will be talking about their findings at the Mobile Dating Conference in Beverly Hills in a focus group, moderated by Julie Spira.

Julie Spira is an online dating, cyber-relations, and mobile dating expert. She creates irresistible profiles for singles on the dating scene.  For more dating advice, sign up for our Weekly Flirt newsletter, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, and like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert

Mobile Dating BootCamp – Meet the Contestants [video]

Nine single daters are using 6 mobile dating apps, as online dating and mobile dating expert Julie Spira helps them find love from their mobile phone. Meet our contestants and cheer them on.

Julie Spira is a mobile and online dating expert and bestselling author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating. For more information visit MobileDatingBootCamp.com and Facebook.com/mobiledatingbootcamp.


Online Dating Advice – How Many People Should I Talk to At Once?

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Ask the Cyber-Dating Expert

We’ve all heard that online dating is a numbers game. 122 million worldwide to be exact according to ComScore’s research.

When we created Jerry’s irresistible profile, [winks, emails, and IMs, oh my!] his response was “OMG, this stuff is like crack!” While we want you to fall in love and give you many tools to do so, we certainly don’t want to create a universe of online dating addicts.

Having too many conversations at once or viewing too many profiles doesn’t mean you’re going to be successful with the process. As a matter of fact, it could actually backfire on you.

The first week your profile is active is always the busiest time.  It then settles down to a more manageable pace. Those who winked at you or flirted with you without a profile are probably not paying members or are not serious about the process, so unless you like their profile, you can just ignore them. If you like the profile, don’t wink or flirt back. Be bold and send an email saying hello. You can even thank them for the wink to let them know you’ve noticed.

I recommended to Jerry that he shouldn’t communicate with more than 5 people at a time. Limiting the ongoing communication will give you the opportunity to get to know someone. If the online conversation goes well, then schedule a phone date.  If you feel like you’re at the dentist’s office where someone is pulling teeth, don’t schedule a date.

I shared my thoughts in the ask the dating experts column on Sparkology on how to politely say you’re not interested.

More often-than-not, online messages are ignored. Don’t start humming to the Nick Lowe song, “You’ve Got to be Cruel to be Kind” if you decide to respond. Say thank you, but add that you don’t feel you have enough in common to pursue a relationship, or let them know if they’re out of your geographic location or age range.

Wishing you much joy and love in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam.

Julie Spira is an online dating expert and cyber-relations expert. She’s the author of the bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and Like us at Facebook.com/cyberdatingexpert for more dating advice.

Finding Love Online – Tonya Hall Radio Show

logoJoin online dating expert Julie Spira as she returns to The Tonya Hall Show on KCRN, The Radio Colorado Network on Friday, March 30, 2012. We’ll be talking about social dating, love and romance in a web 2.0 world.

The online dating industry is continuing to grow at rapid speed with thousands of sites to choose from. Julie and Tonya will talk about how to stand out in the crowded digital marketplace and how to embrace mobile dating.

Should you be sending that Facebook friends request to someone you just started dating? Will you talk about searching him or her on Google? Should you send a text message to confirm?

Call in at 855-464-5905 at 8am/pacific time with your questions. We’ll be discussing this and more on The Tonya Hall Show.

 

 

Why You Should Love Mobile Dating [video]

It’s official. Logging onto your favorite online dating site from your mobile device now ranks ahead of visiting the traditional web version.

Gone are the days where you had to go home to check your email from your desktop after a long day of work. So grab your iPhone, iPad Android and smartphone and start dating and flirting in-real-time.

Enjoy our mobile dating video and when you get a moment, check out our Top 10 Mobile Dating Apps list.  Feel free to add some of your favorites in the comments.

Question: Are you meeting more singles because of location-based mobile dating apps?

Julie Spira is an online and mobile dating expert. She created her first online dating profile in 1994 and today helps singles on the dating scene by creating their irresistible profiles. For more dating advice, follow Julie on Twitter @JulieSpira and at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert

How Digital is Your Love Life?

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Online dating doesn’t mean just signing up for a dating site when you’re single any more. It’s a multi-billion dollar industry filled with mobile apps, dating coaches, and helps both singles find love and couples stay together with ongoing dating tips.

In a pre-Valentine’s Love Goes Digital panel hosted by Kevin Winston of Digital LA, online dating experts and sites discussed dating advice, the growing trend of mobile dating, and how to keep your love alive after the knot has been tied.

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Grant Langston, head of social media at eHarmony and an employee of the site since before it’s launch in 2000 shared his experience on the changes their site has gone through. In my personal opinion, I think they have one of the best iPad apps around. The site will shortly be rolling out a new feature for your eHarmony timeline that’s similar to a  Facebook time-line.

Justin Fredericks, founder of Marriage.com, a video network that curates, produces and promotes videos about wedding, marriage, dating, and relationships talked about the new social networking site Pinterest, as it focuses on women.

Jennifer Kelton from Bad Online Dates talked about her mobile strategy, Bad Date TV, and some niche online dating sites.

I shared with the audience how I created my first online dating profile in 1994 as a charter member of Love@Aol, during the days of the dial-up connection. I penned my stories in my first book, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online and created CyberDatingExpert.com as a place for singles and couples to share their online dating stories. The use of social media on Twitter and Facebook has made a big impact on my brand. I also told singles not to ‘friend’ someone on Facebook before or after a first date. Personally, I think it’s creepy.

The audience was a mixed group of singles, married couples, dating industry executives, love coaches and those who are still looking for love online. We nibbled on chocolate, sipped One Coconut Water, and discussed what you should say or not say in your online dating profile.

At the end of the digital day, most of the audience felt they’d rather keep their love and dating life off of Facebook.

One thing’s for sure. The audience left fully armed with the dos and don’ts of social and online dating in time for Valentine’s Day.

Julie Spira is an online dating expert and founder of CyberDatingExpert.com. She creates irresistible profiles for singles on the dating scene. Follow her @JulieSpira on Twitter. If you loved this post, Like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert for more dating advice.

It’s Complicated – Dating in a Web 2.0 World

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Just in time for Valentine’s, Harlequin publishing has released their 2012 Romance Report card with the resulting grade of, “It’s Complicated.”

Marrying both love and technology has both helped speed up relationships and connect through “Missed Connections,” as well as resulted in hurting someone’s digital feelings. I experienced this first-hand, as my ex-fiancé dumped me in an email during the time when a post-it was passé and Facebook was still an infant. Although it’s very old news in my digital book, I’m hoping that others will think twice before they push the send button or consider having their mobile phones rank higher on the totem pole than their sweetheart this Valentine’s Day.

The romance publisher looked at how Twitter, Facebook, Smartphone and technology has changed the way that men and women communicate with one another in matters of the heart. By polling single women 18-40, they found that the majority (58%) thought technology was a positive force in the dating world. Those who skewed younger (21-24 year olds) preferred texting to calling.

Although 91% of those surveyed said that dating rules had become more flexible, their findings showed that more than half of the women still had traditional values as it relates to romance. Women still want men to as them out, hold the door open for them, and pay for the first date. 82% of those surveyed said they preferred dating a guy with a sense of humor. With, or without technology, not much has changed in these areas.

However, Harlequin added in some dating “deal-breakers,” and they found that three out of five were technology-related. Having a too-needy guy was on the top of the list (32%),  followed closely behind with a dependence on a BlackBerry or iPhone (31%), too many Facebook photos with an ex-girlfriend (29%), and those who were grammatically challenged (24%). Oh how simple it really is to untag an ex when you breakup and use spell-check during the digital courtship process. If men knew how easy it was to fix these little things, perhaps more relationships would flourish.

As for those deal-breakers, relationship expert Dr. Wendy Walsh says, “Men who are addicted to their smart phones may be too disconnected from real world relationships or may have a tech-induced attention-deficit-disorder that could impair kindness and intelligence.” Walsh added, “Men who display too many photos of themselves with their ex’s on Facebook may be showcasing their prior conquests to indicate that they are a player and out for sex rather than love.”

So what do women think is romantic? It’s not the price tag of a gift as much as remembering the small details and showing that you care. At the end of the digital day, romance is alive and well and all you really need is love.

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Julie Spira is an online dating expert and founder of Cyber-Dating Expert. She creates irresistible profiles for singles on the dating scene and writes about the marriage of love and technology on Huffington Post. Julie is the author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating and The Rules of Netiquette.  Follow her @JulieSpira on Twitter and at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert

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