With Valentine’s Day just a month away, singles are thinking about red hearts and online dating sites are seeing record activity.
According to CNN, some online dating sites have surged by up to 350% in the past two months, so singles looking for love online can have more choices to find a date or mate for the holiday season.
So how can you ramp up your search in the next 30 days?
Here are 5 tips that will shorten the search so you can ride into the digital sunset together.
1. Become a Social Dater. If you’re constantly updating your status on Facebook and posting new photos on Instagram, Pinterest, and Flickr, go ahead and share some of those on your online dating profile as well. Toss out the outdated blurry photos, group shots, and the arm hanging over your shoulder and replace them with newer photos that reflect who you are today. Remember to post a caption under the photos and add the date they were taken, so your potential suitors can see there’s truth-in-advertising
2. Don’t Wait, Initiate. I know the “Rules” book says a woman should never ever contact a man, but I disagree with this one. There’s a fine line between chasing a guy and playing hard-to-get. Playing the waiting game won’t fill your date card. Sure if you call a guy all the time, you might be considered needy, but most men are so frustrated with writing to women online who never respond. Your quick introduction email will be refreshing to him. Send a flirt, wink, or a nudge, if you’d like to subtly get his attention. Rate his profile or let him know you’ve viewed it, so he can see you’re interested.
3. Flirt on Facebook. Finding love on the world’s largest social network will expand your search. Facebook reported that 40.5% of their members changed their relationship status in 2012 to “Single,” as compared to 29.2% who changed their status to “In a Relationship.” Check out Facebook chat and see if someone who captures your eye is online and start the conversation. Go ahead an Poke someone and see if it’s returned like a digital boomerang.
4. Log on Daily. If you keep your online dating profile hidden with the fear that you’ll look desperate, the result is you just won’t get found as easily. Change your settings to being visible while logged on, so you can show up higher in a search. Take it one step further and turn on the chat and instant message feature. It’s time to start flirting online.
5. Practice the Magic of 5. If you’d go on a few job interviews every day to find your dream position, shouldn’t you do the same with your personal life? Go ahead and book five dates a week. Sound overwhelming? Not really. Schedule two coffee dates, one lunch date, and two dates for drinks to fill your calendar with potential male suitors. By the weekend, you should have date number two on your calendar. Even if you don’t meet “the one,” you’ll be expanding your social network. I call it casting a wide net. You never know if a party invitation will follow.
Practice these five tips from now until Valentine’s Day and look forward to the possibility of finding love online.
Julie Spira is a top online dating expert, bestselling author and the founder of CyberDatingExpert.com. She creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert.
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It was a joy and honor to be a guest with Marc Cohen and Marsha Collier on Computer & Technology Radio Show to talk about the latest trends in online dating.
From niche sites such as Farmer’s Only and Stache Passions to household names of eHarmony, OkCupid, and Match.com, find out which singles are really logging into Internet dating sites. We also talked about the huge trend of mobile dating, which is becoming more-and-more popular every day.
If you’re looking for a date for the holidays, find out the best ways to create an irresistible profile worth catching his or her eye.
Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace this holiday, or wherever you may roam.
Julie Spira is an online dating expert, bestselling author, and founder of Cyber-Dating Expert. She creates irresistible profiles for singles on the dating scene and is the host of Online Dating BootCamp. For more dating advice, sign up for the Weekly Flirt, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert.
When singles initially sign up for an online dating site, they tend to think it will be smooth sailing. They expect to check their in-box the next day and see it full of messages from attractive, successful singles who are excited to meet them. Unfortunately, it’s not always a perfect world. Some online daters spend hours perfecting their profiles and uploading their best photos; yet still feel disappointed at the lack of emails.
Here are five surprising reasons from our friends at We Love Dates, as to why you might not be getting enough email messages online.
1. Your profile is like a laundry list.
While it’s a good idea to be specific about what you’re looking for, if you use your profile as a checklist of the qualities a date must absolutely have, you’re likely to run the risk of appearing too picky.
Online dating is a two-way street. Rather than just stating what you’re looking for, let someone know what you can bring to the relationship. If you’re describing a perfect person who doesn’t exist, those reading your profile will assume they’ll fall short and will move on to another pretty face.
2. Your photos are inconsistent.
It’s so important to upload photos that show how you look today, not those from the hot trend five years ago. Even if you think you looked better last decade, those photos are not an accurate reflection of how you appear today. Singles will check out your Facebook profile to see if you dating profile resembles the real you. Looking different in each photo will cause confusion and he’ll be quick to hit “next.
3. You’re too negative.
Dating can be extremely difficult, but your online dating profile isn’t the place to air your grievances about your ex boyfriend or about not getting your spousal support check. Being negative in your profile shows that you’re potentially not over past experiences that have hurt you, or are a real life “Debbie or Donnie Downer.” Both of these qualities are not attractive. Plus, if you complain so publicly about your dating life, a date might worry about what’s next on your complaint list. He may have just run away from a nagging girlfriend or wife and doesn’t want a repeat performance. Try to remain positive and be more like the person you’d actually want to date.
4. Your profile is filled with typos and incorrect grammar.
When your profile is a mess grammatically, it tells the world that you haven’t put very much effort into the process. Simply put, it’s far from irresistible. If you wouldn’t dream of posting a Linkedin profile with typos and bad grammar, know that your dream date wouldn’t consider you as a likely prospect for love either. It’s not necessary to be an award-winning essayist, but using spell-check goes a long way to make a good first digital impression. Take it a step further and ask a friend to proofread your profile to catch any errors you might have missed. Your profile is the first glance you’re giving potential dates, so invest the time and energy to make it the best it can be.
5. You’re on the wrong dating site.
There are over 1500 online dating sites, with new ones popping up every week. Online dating sites aren’t one-size fits all. If you find that one particular site isn’t working out for you, don’t give up on online dating completely. Find another site with more members or try a niche site based upon your unique interests. The menu of online dating sites caters to specific religions, activities or ages, and can also be divided based upon casual dating or finding a serious relationship or marriage. There are plenty of success stories in our Cyber Love Story of the Week from a variety of dating sites. Experiment and find out what online dating sites work for you.
Julie Spira is an online dating expert and founder of CyberDatingExpert.com. As the top digital matchmaker, Julie creates irresistible online dating profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more dating advice, sign up for our Weekly Flirt Newsletter and like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert
Photo credit: © dundanim – Fotolia.com
There’s no shortage of online dating sites popping up every week. The newest sites are called niche sites as they bring a hook to the digital table. From group dating, to setting up your pets, to the latest trend of incorporating Facebook and the vote of approval from your friends to help set up your dates, it can make your head spin, or at least your fingers tired.
What does this mean for singles in the crowded digital marketplace? When I was asked by my friends at Huffington Post to comment on an article they were writing called New Online Dating Sites Bring Your Friends Along for the Ride, about these new sites such as The Complete.me, Yoke.me, and Circle.es, it made me realize that singles do want to see accountability from potential dates. Sure I got fixed up on one of these sites with a photo of Michael Jackson to a man named Michael, so it’s data in, data out. But it sure does make you feel good when you see some of your friends on Facebook who really knows your potential date.
Our Mobile Dating Bootcamp will be starting next week and some of the contestants will be using some of these newer Facebook dating apps. We’ll be reporting on their findings, but until these sites get enough members to sign up, you might find yourself a digital pen-pal out of your geographic area. Our findings will be presented at the Internet Dating and Mobile Dating Conference in June.
Would you try a dating site that matched you based on your Facebook friends?
Full article @Huffington Post
Julie Spira is the leading online dating expert and founder of CyberDatingExpert.com. Julie created her first dating profile over 15 years ago and today, she provides irresistible profiles for singles on the dating scene. Julie was named one of America’s Ultimate Experts in Woman’s World magazine and was called the pioneer of online dating by Cosmo. For online dating advice, join the conversation at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert and follow @JulieSpira on Twitter.
Some dating tips include:
- Do a Google search for your date’s email
- Do a Google search for your date’s phone number
- Set up a Google Voice number for dating
- Set up a gmail account on Google for dating purposes
- Trust your intuition and report any suspicious activity to the online dating site
At the end of the digital day, there are a lot of terrific people joining online dating sites. You just be able to find your match.
Julie Spira is an online dating expert, cyber-relations expert, and author of the bestseller, “The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. Visit her at CyberDatingExpert.com, where you can sign up for the Weekly Flirt dating advice newsletter. Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert.
If you watched the CNBC online dating documentary, Love at First Byte, hosted by NBC news and Today Show Correspondent Amy Robach, you learned that there are over 1500 sites in the digital dating world. Amy featured niche sites such as Farmers Only and Equestrian Singles, but there are so many more. Some sites are wacky, others are serious.
The Miami Herald reports, “Dating sites become more mainstream, and focus on more niche markets.” From pet lovers and Gothic fanatics to Harley Davidson enthusiasts and those with pre-existing medical conditions, there’s a site for you. Are you ready to jump on board? Here are 14 sites to consider trying this Valentine’s.
1. Stache Passions – Tagline: Oh Yeah, it’s All About the ‘Stache!
There’s a constant debate as to whether women like men with facial hair. To shave, or not to shave? On this free dating site, men post their bearded look and the women who love them will jump on board.
2. We Waited – Do you dream of waiting staying a virgin until your wedding night? If so, We Waited is your site. Created by a couple, who did just that, this is a niche site with rules.
3. Harley Connect –Tagline: Where Single Harley Riders Meet.
Would you like to share your passion with other single bikers? If you’re looking for a guy with a Road King or a Harley Davidson Heritage Softail, this site is for you. Get ready to ride into the sunset with your helmets a-tow.
4. Geek 2 Geek – Tagline: The best place on the net to meet Geeks.
While online dating was in its infancy, most of the members were technology geeks. Now that it’s become mainstream, you’ll want to easily connect with another Geek, who won’t have problems remembering the url of GK2GK.
5. Date My Pet – Tagline: Date me. Date my Pet.
I say love me, love my pet. For those with severe allergies, I suggest you go elsewhere. For the guys who insist on having their primary online dating photo with their puppy, here’s a place where you’ll be welcome. Added bonus: Terrific pet advice.
6. Gothic Match – Tagline: #1 Online Dating Community for Gothic Singles and Friends.
Are you ready to share that tatoo or commiserate over its removal? Find like-minded singles you can relate to.
7. Sparkology – Tagline: An invite only luxury site for young professionals.
To join, guys will need to have graduated from one of the Top 50 schools, and women need to just have a college degree and well, have a great photo. The site was launched less than four months ago in New York, but they have plans to expand to other metropolitan cites. Would you change your zip code to meet one of these Ivy League guys?
8. Veggie Date – Tagline:– Winner of the 2010 Veg News Veggie Awards for Best Dating Site.
This site lets you sign up for 2 free weeks, so you can dine without beef together with a vegan of your choice. Was there competition? Yes, you can also check out Vegetarian Connections, the site where Vegetarians connect.
9. Dating 4 Disabled – Tagline: Where friendship and romance are only a click away
Online dating gives hope to singles, but many with medical issues and disabilities do feel hopeless. Created to empower the disabled community, this dating and social networking site allows their members to blog about how they are coping with their medical condition.
10. Fitness Singles –Tagline: Where Relationships Workout. You’re active.
You like to hike and bike and would like to share these activities with your date. This is the world’s largest online dating community for sports and fitness enthusiasts. I sat next to a couple at a Super Bowl party who met on this site and have been happily married for 5 years.
11. Women Behind Bars – Tagline: In Search of a Better Life.
Providing an inmate search and pictures for prison women who are looking for penpals while incarcerated. Should those with a criminal record be able to date? You won’t find them accepted on most mainstream sites, but It must get lonely in prison.
12. Pink Sofa – Tagline: Connecting Lesbians.
You can find a date or a friend on the world’s biggest lesbian meeting place. Liz James created this site 12 years ago as an online community and spoke at last year’s Internet Dating Conference in Beverly Hills.
13. Christian Mingle – Tagline: Find God’s Match for You.
From the people that brought you JDate, the largest Jewish online dating site, Christian Mingle now boasts 5 million users with a winning formula that works.
14. Our Time – Tagline: The Place Where Over 50 Meet.
While the site name might be new, Our Time was rebranded last year from People Media’s Senior People Meet to help singles 50+ find love on the Internet. The CNBC documentary showed that the 55+ singles market has increased by 40% since 2008. Some studies show that the over 60 crowd is the fastest growing demographic. This is great news for those who felt their digital shelf-life might have expired. Hint. Kids, sign your parents up if they’re alone.
Honorable mention: Facebook. Facebook isn’t just the world’s largest social network. Singles are chatting with friends-of-friends and glancing at photos resulting in many a Facebook marriage. With over 800 million members, by default even if even a fraction of Facebook’s singles started dating, it would make them the world’s largest dating site.
Most sites do let you sign up for free. Check out some of our Favorite Dating Sites as well. For a comprehensive look at the online dating industry, CNBC’s Love at First Byte will air again on February 14, 2012 at 8pm/eastern time. Set your DVR if you’ll be on an online date with your Valentine.
Julie Spira is an online dating expert and founder of CyberDatingExpert.com. She creates irresistible profiles for singles on the dating scene and is the bestselling author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and her like her at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert for dating advice.
By now you’ve probably heard the good news. Online Dating has officially lost its stigma and now ranks second in the U.S. for matchmaking. Whether you’ve met your dream date or spouse by answering 250 questions on eHarmony or answered some intimate questions on OkCupid, one thing’s for sure, online dating is no longer for the socially challenged. It’s here to stay and is now residing primarily on your mobile phone or iPad.
A group of 5 researchers collected data on the subject to be published in the February issue of the Journal for the Association of Psychological Science. These experts claim that these dating algorithms are nonsense. The report claims that online dating encourages a “shopping mentality” and that singles are getting too picky with too many choices. Do you agree? Is it just the luck of the draw, or is there some magic to the proprietary methods Internet dating sites use to keep you engaged and active on their site?
Dating algorithms and scientific matching were a subject of heated panel at the recent Internet Dating Conference in Miami, where Dr. Eli J. Finkel, the study’s lead author and an associate professor of social psychology at Northwestern University, said there was no science behind the algorithms. OkCupid’s CEO and co-founder Sam Yagan and Dr. Pepper Schwartz, professor of sociology at the University of Washington in Seattle, who created the Personality Profiler for online dating site Perfect Match, vehemently disagreed. The sites stood by their list of questions to help singles meet better matches, whether through math or science.
At the end of the digital day, online dating has become social dating, and it’s not going away anytime soon.
How do you feel about personality profiles on Chemistry, Perfect Match, and eHarmony.com? Do you believe you’ll get better matches? Are you finding it hard to commit with too many choices in your inbox?
Your comments are welcome and appreciated.
Julie Spira is an online dating expert and bestselling author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating. Visit her at CyberDatingExpert.com for dating advice and follow Julie on Twitter @JulieSpira and at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert
How digital is your love life? Come to the Digital LA – Love Goes Digital panel on February 13, 2012, where we’ll be talking about online and social dating.
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
January 31, 2012 — Los Angeles, CA — Julie Spira, bestselling author of “The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online” and a frequent media guest on the subject of online and social dating will be a featured panelist on the first-ever “Love Goes Digital” panel, hosted by Digital LA on February 13, 2012.
Julie will discuss social dating trends, how she helps singles by creating their online dating profiles, and about how she successfully used social media strategies to help her online dating book become a bestseller.
“For our pre-Valentine’s Day Digital LA – Loves Goes Digital panel, we want to celebrate by getting LA’s experts in online dating and love together, to share tips, trends, and success stories in building dating/love related blogs and businesses,” said Kevin Winston, Digital LA founder. “It’s the first time we know of that local dating and love experts have been gathered on a panel in Los Angeles.”
The event will be held at Hotel Shangri-La in Santa Monica, CA.
You might have your favorite online dating site, but did you know the Internet dating industry actually has their own awards ceremony, similar to the Academy Awards?
iDate Conference organizer Marc Lesnick emceed the 3rd Annual iDate Awards ceremony along with Mark Brooks from Online Personals Watch. It was an honor and privilege to also be a presenter at the event held in Miami Beach on January 24, 2012.
The Internet Dating Executive Alliance and dating site members and users had the opportunity to vote.for their favorites in 12 categories.
OkCupid walked away with 3 iDate awards, received by Sam Yagan, CEO and co-founder of the site. Gary Kremen, known for creating online dating back in 1993 by being the original creator of Match.com received a well-deserved special Lifetime Achievement Award. Gary was a Keynote speaker earlier in the day,
The complete list of winners are….
Best Dating Site – OkCupid
Best Dating Site Design – OkCupid
Best Dating Software Provider – White Label Dating
Best Mobile Dating App – Grindr
Best Dating Coach – Evan Marc Katz
Most Innovative Company – OkCupid
Best New Technology – Grindr
Best Up-And-Coming Dating Site – How About We
Best Marketing Campaign – Match.com
Best Affiliate Program – FriendFinder
Best Payment System – Paymentwall.com
Best Matchmaker – Julie Ferman, Cupids Coach/eLove
We’ll be posting video highlights from the conference with the latest in online dating safety, mobile dating, and letting you know about some of the new niche sites that might help while looking for love online.
It was a pleasure attending the 8th Annual Internet Dating Conference in Miami again, where I had the honor to speak on Web Dating 2.0: Using Social Media to Create Brand Loyalty on January 20, 2011.
Several hundred people attended the session on day 2 of the 3-day conference.
In my presentation, I shared the exciting news that both Zoosk Mobile and SpeedDate Mobile apps have each had more than 2 million downloads. OkCupid’s mobile app has over 1 million mobile users. eHarmony says their mobile apps account for approximately 20% of global site visits. Consumers now look at eHarmony profiles more than 16,000 times per hour while using mobile devices. Their mobile app was launched in August, 2009 in conjunction with their 10th anniversary. Match says mobile users are twice as engaged as those who log onto the site on their desktop, so we are definitely going mobile.
We learned from Online Personals Watch Publisher Mark Brooks that online dating hit a record high in December 2010 with 116 million members worldwide visiting online dating sites. Over 20 million visits were from U.S. members. The folks from Google shared that 35 hours of video content is uploaded on YouTube every minute of the day. Online dating is a 1.3 billion dollar industry now according to Jupiter Research.
One of the highlights of the conference was the 2nd annual iDate Awards. This year OkCupid won 4 iDate Awards including Best Dating Site, Best Dating Site Design, Most Innovative Company, and Best Up and Coming Dating Site. Congratulations to OkCupid for winning in every category that they were nominated in and matching the number of Golden Globe Awards received as The Social Network film. My friend Julie Ferman won the Best Matchmaker Award for the second year in a row and it was certainly well deserved.
It was terrific spending time with Sherri Langburt from Single Edition, Ravit Abelman from Omnidate, Julie Ferman from Cupid’s Coach, and eLove’s Paul Falzone while catching up with Sam Yagan from OkCupid and Kate Billenki from Plenty of Fish. All have been featured guests on Ask the Cyber-Dating Expert Radio Show. Dating blogger Simone Grant came to iDate for her first time and we brainstormed about dating, blogging, and social media.
The Final Debate
The conference ended with the Final Panel Debate curated by Marc Lesnick, Conference Organizer and included Mark McMaster from Google, Mark Brooks from Online Personals Watch, Michael McQuown from Thunder Road, Jonathan Crutchley from Manhunt, Mark Harrison from Dating Factory, Joel Simkhal from Grindr, Markus Frind from Plenty of Fish, Sam Yagan from OkCupid, Ty from Elite Global Dating and Dan Winchester from FreeDating.co.uk. At the end of the annual end of conference panel, the majority of the panelists felt that online dating would continue to grow in 2011.
Free Versus Paid
The hot topic this year was Free versus Paid online dating sites. Free sites have been rising in popularity and have made a small dent in the paid online dating services. Compared to the cost of high-end matchmakers, paid online dating sites are still a bargain.
To view my presentation, visit SocialMediaMore.com/idate