Over the years, I’ve seen many marriage proposals for couples who have met online. Watching all of the top nominees in the Top Proposal contest brought tears to my eyes. I’m truly happy for all of the couples who have found love on JDate.
I selected Eric’s music video proposal of “I Do Love You” to Nina for several reasons. It was the most creative, truly fun to watch, and featured many highlights of their beautiful courtship. I found myself smiling and humming the whole way through, especially when she said, “Yes!”
Featuring a song and dance by Groom-to-Be Eric LaBarre, the heartwarming video tells the story of how the two met on JDate and the development of their relationship leading up to the special moment. When LaBarre knew he wanted to propose to Nina Sturtz, he recruited her best friend to help create the video and included family and friends in its production. The proposal was inspired by Sturtz’s love of musical theatre, and she calls the video “the most perfect Nina proposal ever!”
The couple has won a 7-day vacation to the Bahamas.
It’s a joy to feature Eric and Nina in our Cyber Love Story of the Week. Congratulations to both of you from your friends at CyberDatingExpert.com.
Do you have an online dating story to share?
Julie Spira is a top online dating expert and was an early adopter of Internet dating. She’s been helping singles find love online for 20 years with her Irresistible Profiles programs. For more online dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert and sign up for our free Weekly Flirt newsletter.
One day, she decided to turn to online dating and joined Match.com.
“It was the summer of 2011 when I joined Match,” explains Becky.
“I tried Match because I guess….after so many years of not being in the dating world, I figured that would be the best way to meet people.”
Becky had a few dates, but they weren’t her cup of tea.
Then in October of 2011, she started communicating with Philip. Phil had been single for over 10 years before meeting Becky.
After talking via email and phone for a week or so, the two agreed to meet for a late lunch on October 13 at Pappy & Harriett’s.
“It was so much fun,” explains Becky. “We just kept talking and laughing, and talking and laughing, and he took me for a ride on his motorcycle. Five hours later we had a hard time parting ways, wanting to spend more time together. But we did say good-bye for the night.”
The next morning Philip emailed Becky and said…”You definitely have my attention”. We have been together ever since, splitting time
between both Becky and Philip’s homes.
When I saw Becky and Phil, they were celebrating their 2-year anniversary and couldn’t stop saying “I love you” to each other.
Congratulations to Becky and Philip, who prove you can start your life all over again while looking for love online.
Do you have an online dating story to share?
Julie Spira is a top online dating expert and founder of CyberDatingExpert.com. Julie was an early adopter of Internet dating and has been helping singles find love online for 20 years with her Irresistible Profiles and Online Dating BootCamp programs.
Follow @JulieSpira for dating advice and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt.
I know this seems like a lot of pressure, but to simplify the Internet dating process, we’ve come up with several expert tips on how to ace your cyberdating exam.
Coordinating a first date to make that great impression makes singles nervous. One person may love coffee, where another would rather go hiking. Trying to find a common balance for your first meet-and-greet, especially when geography gets in the way, means a single dater must go with the flow to fill up their date card.
This means you must be easy-going, have several options on where to meet, and not appear too high-maintenance.
Here are two examples of how one date progressed nicely and another went south, fast.
Dater #1. When *Randy decided to make the dinner plans before the theatre date, he came up with a well-executed strategy. It was his homework assignment to select the restaurant and figure out how to coordinate the details. Sure it would have been easy to tell him to park once and just dine at the restaurant in the theatre, but he came up with a more complicated plan and told his date the following:
Unfortunately the restaurant doesn’t have a shuttle to the theatre, but I’ve thought of a plan to minimize the parking issue and maximize our time at dinner.
Try this on…
You drive into downtown and park at the theatre (or wherever you like near there) for about 5:30 PM and call me when you arrive to say where you are. I’ll drive over to pick you up and bring you to my building to park my car; and then we walk just a few blocks to the restaurant. After dinner, we take a taxi to get to the theatre, unfettered with driving and parking while others are arriving, and just walk in. After the event, you take your car out, and drive us a few blocks back to my building; I’ll hop out at the front door on the street safe and sound :-) and you continue straight toward to the highway to get home – real simple. Does this work?
What do you think?
It sounds like an exhausting plan, right? There was nothing simple about it. However, he took great pride in coordinating timing and location and just wanted acknowledgement that his idea would be well-accepted.
The lesson here is the best solution isn’t always the smartest solution when it comes to dating. Sure some women think that they’re smarter and can drive the dating train, but a man wants to be the woman’s hero. He wants to know that she approves of his plans. His efforts to coordinate their dinner date were well thought out. Telling him to change them, especially early on in the dating stage, could possibly backfire. She responded with, “Great plan. I love it! I’ll see you around 5:30pm.”
Dater #3. When *Kathy invited her online date to an outdoor concert, she had tickets for the summertime music festival where they would be picnicking. Her date offered to pick up some wine and food items and they agreed to drive together to the concert. That was, until she called him up and asked him what he would be wearing. When he replied that he would be dressed casually in a Hawaiian shirt, shorts, and sandals, she got furious with him. She told him he wasn’t dressing appropriately for a date and that she hated Hawaiian shirts and shorts. Stunned, because this was a casual outdoor concert in the summer, he thought he’d be dressed perfectly for the occasion. She abruptly canceled the date because he didn’t conform to her perceived dress code and she went alone to the concert. Did he ever call her again? Not in a million years.
At the end of the digital day, when someone plays hard-to-get in the online dating game, the only word the potential date will remember is that you were “hard” to deal with. Don’t make dating difficult. Enjoy the process and go with the flow.
Julie Spira is an Online Dating Expert and was an early adopter of Internet dating. She’s been helping singles on the dating scene with her Irresistible Online Dating Profiles for 20 years and is the author of the bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. For more dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.
We all know that Halloween is a great time to dress up and flirt. Since it falls on a Thursday this year, the weekend before will be filled with lots of parties to go to, while still saving your costume to wear again on October 31st.
Our friends at Plenty of Fish researched the most popular Halloween costumes for 2013 to see what singles would be wearing this year.
Of the 2000 single men and women polled, POF found the vixen costume ranked high for the guys, where the girls were attracted to the Super hero, with Batman costumes high on the list. Almost 25% of the women polled would be happy to flirt with a Batman, so they’ll be in luck this year. POF’s poll found that 32% of the single men would be wearing a Batman costume.
Costume stores are finding Cyrus’s MTV Video Music Awards mouse outfit to be the big seller this year. While we expect many single ladies to dress up as Miley Cyrus this year, some guys still like the classic beauty look. POF found that 25% of single men would find it easy to approach a twerker, while 20.5% would be happy to approach a classic beauty dressed as Kate Middleton.
Just like online dating profiles, where women are looking for a man with a sense of humor, 51% of the women said they’d be attracted to a guy wearing a funny costume. The guys polled were not in favor of approaching a woman dressed in a pregnant Kim Kardashian costume.
Can you fall in love on Halloween or will singles just be looking to hook up? POF found that 53% of women gave a thumbs down to hooking up on Halloween and an overwhelming 87% said they’ve never had a one-night stand on Halloween.
We say it’s time to log on to your online dating site and update your profile to include the Halloween festivities you’ll be attending and what you’ll be wearing. You never know, you just might find an online date this weekend to celebrate Halloween with.
Photo credits: Miley Cyrus Costume: $189. at Bonanza.com. Batman Costume: $48.99 and Orange jumpsuit $19,99 at HalloweenCostumes.com.
Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and let us know what you’ll be dressing up as this Halloween.
Julie Spira is an online dating expert and was an early adopter of Internet dating. She’s the founder of CyberDatingExpert.com and creates irresistible profiles for singles on the dating scene. For online dating advice, sign up for the Free Weekly Flirt newsletter.
A new study from Pew Research shows that online dating has risen in popularity. While most of us realize this from the everyday conversations we’re having with singles on the dating scene, we really need to credit the introduction and rise of mobile dating apps for the increase in acceptance to digital dating.
When Pew conducted their research study in 2005, more singles hid the fact that they were dating online. Eight years ago, 29% thought that dating on the Internet was just something those who were desperate had to do. Fortunately, the number has shrunk to 21% today.
So who’s dating the most online?
According to the study, single men and women from 25-34 are the most popular demographic for Internet daters.
Other important statistics from the survey include:
- 42% know someone who has used online dating
- 29% know someone who has been in a long-term relationships or marriage with someone they’ve met online
- 66% of online daters have gone out on a date with someone they met on a dating site
- 11% of adult American Internet users have used online dating sites
- 38% of those who are “single and looking” have used online dating sites and mobile dating apps.
While these numbers continue to rise from Pew’s survey in 2005, over half of those who have dated online have had a bad experience. From misrepresentation of age, weight, marital status and more, we wish there was more truth-in-advertising with Internet dating.
Along with looking for love online, the Pew survey showed that many still felt the need to research their past relationships online. It’s hard not to be curious about what your ex is up to when he or she continues to post photos on Facebook or update their status on Twitter publicly. Suddenly social media makes it easy to do an impromptu background search to see if you’re former flame is single or in a relationship. The study showed that 30% of social networking users were researching those they were interested in dating. This proves that singles really need to make sure they keep their Facebook pages and date-friendly.
On Facebook Love Stories, we teach singles how to keep their Facebook pages more dateable. Think about it, your Linkedin Profile needs to help you find your dream job by being professional. It would make sense then that your Facebook page needs to reflect your single status.
*Hint: It might be time to do some digital housekeeping to remove photos of you with your kissing cousin or ex BF or GF.
At the end of the digital day, we’re creating a permanent digital footprint whenever we post. If you’re single, make sure you’re reflecting the real you, not the idealized person you think your date is dreaming to meet.
Julie Spira is a top Online Dating Expert and was an early adopter of Internet dating. She’s been helping singles on the dating scene for 20 years with her Irresistible Profiles. For more online dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the Free Weekly Flirt newsletter.
Photo credit: © erinphoto10 – Fotolia.com
A new poll of 2046 people conducted by Harris Interactive for People Search site Spokeo shows over 3/4 of singles 18+ want to know more about their date before they even meet in person, early on in a relationship.
What are singles looking for when they’re sneaking a peek online?
The survey’s results showed the following:
- 58% were interested in finding out about their date’s past
- 45% wanted to feel more confident about their date
- 31% wanted to see if they had friends in common
- 26% wondered if they were cheating
With search engines still the most popular way to check out your date (68%), social networks are creeping up to a close second at 64%.
While many confront their date about suspicious activity if they think they’re cheating, some take the digital data at face value and actually end the relationship.
The infographic below highlights the details of this latest poll.
Are you checking our your dates? Does your digital dating include using social media site such as Facebook to find out more or using search engines when you’re a cyber-sleuth?
Your comments are welcome!
72% of Americans Search Before They Date – An infographic by the team at Spokeo People Search
Julie Spira is a top Online Dating Expert and author of the bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. She creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more online dating advice, sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter and follow @JulieSpira on Twitter.
On Take Part Live on PointTV, we tackled the subject of digital dating and how texting and social media have affected our love lives.
It was a honor and joy to be a featured guest on the program with hosts Jacob Soboroff and Cara Santa Maria.
I was joined with Comedienne and Glamour blogger Phoebe Robinson, who appeared earlier on Raising McCain with Meghan McCain, and Jessica Sorbino.
One of the main questions that came up is should you change your Facebook relationship status? The opinions from the panel differed. Phoebe met her boyfriend on Facebook and checked out his profile before agreeing to going on a date. I said that everyone who is single should list their relationship status as Facebook could be the world’s largest dating site, and Jessica believes you shouldn’t list a relationship status at all, so forget about “It’s Complicated.”
How long should you wait to respond to his or her text message? Are we becoming Internet dating addicts? Watch the show segment for details.
You can read more in this article on Digital Technology and Romantic Relationships.
Internet dating, social dating, Facebook dating, meeting offline or at work, what’s a single dater to do?
A question I get asked often about online dating versus meeting someone offline is, which method is better for me to find the perfect date or mate?
While experts might not agree on this topic, even offline Matchmakers are incorporating digital dating into their business. I believe the answer is clear. There is no one-size fits all formula and everyone’s relationship goals may differ. From hook-ups to marriage proposals, there’s a site and way for everyone.
In my dating coaching practice, I work with singles who are truly looking for a meaningful relationship and send those looking to hookup to a variety of mobile dating apps. Whether it leads you to marriage or not, finding love online needs to be part of your dating regime, just like finding a job online from a message board or Linkedin will help you find your dream job. Being able to grow and maintain your relationship offline is critical as you go through the different phases of a relationship.
As one who believes in casting a wide net, I tell singles that you really need to do both. It’s not one way or the other. In reality, online dating, if done correctly, is just a method or service that will get you out there in the real world to meet someone offline IRL (In-Real-Life).
However, some really think the process of finding someone to love is an either-or proposition. I beg to differ. If you’re truly not comfortable with the computer and don’t think your iPhone or Android is truly a SmartPhone, you’re leaving opportunities behind that could change your relationship status to “In a Relationship,” “Engaged” or “Married” while your friends cheer you on.
Here are some pros and cons on finding love both online and offline.
Pro: Over 40 million singles in the U.S have tried online dating.
Con: It’s a crowded digital marketplace and can be an exhausting experience.
Pro: One out of five relationships start online. Whether it’s on Social media, Facebook, Twitter, a mobile app, or traditional online dating site, there are a lot of success stories.
Con: People lie about their age, weight, height, income, and marital status. Singles get frustrated after a few bad dates.
Pro: You can meet people outside of your geographic area and social circle with similar interests. You’ll meet more people, so you can learn what you’re truly looking for in a date, mate, or relationship.
Con: It can become addicting to some, who never meet offline or are looking for the next pretty face. Beware of the Digital Pen-Pal Syndrome.
Pro: It’s efficient and available 24-hours a day.
Con: It’s like a full-time job for many and you must be organized.
Pro: You may have friends in common which will make you more comfortable.
Con: You’re not really sure of their relationship status.
Pro: You can determine if there’s chemistry in person.
Con: You’re limited to your existing social circles or regular activities and will meet less people.
Pro: It’s pre-dating, without the pressure of wondering if you’re date is who they say they are.
Con: People decide too quickly that they aren’t interested or have no chemistry.
Pro: You can develop new friendships with people with similar interests, even if it doesn’t turn into a romantic relationship.
Con: You’re limiting yourself to a certain geographic area.
At the end of the digital day, if you’re serious about meeting someone special, you must include a combination of both online and offline dating in your routine. Remember the goal of online dating is to take your relationship offline. Riding into the digital sunset together is now a way of everyday life.
If you need a little hand holding, contact us about our Irresistible Profiles and dating coaching to help you find your dream date.
Julie Spira is an Online Dating Expert who was a very early adopter of the Internet. She created her first dating profile almost 20 years ago and has been helping singles on the dating scene. Julie’s the author of the bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the Free Weekly Flirt.
She takes the plunge, with a little help from online dating expert and celebrity online dating coach, Julie Spira.
In this segment, Online Dating For Dummies: Guess Who’s The Dummy Is In This Situation? Julie helps Kim, from the Kim Jim & Kim Morning Show on Fresh 102.7 in New York embark on her very first journey into online dating.
Believe it or not, Kim has never tried online dating and co-host Jim, along with producer Craig and myself are going to turn Kim into an Internet dating superstar.
In this segment, we talk about creating Kim’s profile with a catchy screen name. Jim suggested, “DesperationinNYC.” Kim says she’s kitchen impaired and is looking for a guy who will cook her dinner. She admits to sleeping with her two dogs in bed at night, but believes there’s still room for a guy in her life (and bed!)
Kim’s afraid she might scare men off, but she actually likes watching Monday night football.
Listen now to this segment and follow Kim’s progress on Fresh1027.com
In this Episode of the Online Dating Expert BootCamp, Julie Spira critiques Lauren’s emails that she’s sending to potential daters.
Much to her surprise, Lauren’s emails were filled with grammar problems and she started her emails with the word, “Hey.” Julie reminded Lauren that horses hang out in hay, not a marriage-minded single woman from Beverly Hills.
Remember to always use spell check and grammar check on all of your online dating emails and respond in a timely fashion to attract your dream date.